It isn't uncommon to hear of parents being divorced. Nearly every other person you talk to has had to go through a separation of parents and has had their life turned upside down.
More often than you'd want to believe, these divorces only get worse as time goes on. Mother's and father's disregard their children and how they feel and they allow bitterness and revenge get in the way of what really matters.
I, however, have been lucky enough to have parents who have pushed differences aside inorder to ensure that my siblings and I were taken care of and had a stable environment to live in. It was never mom versus dad. They were a team when it came to us and I have been fortunate to have that.
Today I want to talk about the importance of co-parenting. To me, it sounds like a simple task but to some it isn't so. I have a few different areas in which I feel I have benefited from my parents working together despite not being together and I would like to share them with you.
1. Being Grounded:
It wasn't often that I was getting in trouble but when I was, it was at both houses. If I came home from school with a bad note from my teacher I was grounded. If Dad decided to take my phone away, it meant that when I went to my mother's house I didn't have a phone their either. While at the time I hated this, I now see that it gave me stability and the opportunity to learn from my mistakes rather than seeing it as one parent being mean.
2. Clothes:
While this one may seem slightly weird, it really isn't. A lot of times when you have children who live in two houses, they have to pack their bags to go from one to another. This keeps the children from ever feeling like they have a real home. Do your best to have a good supply of clothing and personal items at each house. Your kid shouldn't feel like they're just visiting, they should feel like they're at home. Its a simple yet good strategy to give the child more comfort.
3. Don't Speak ill of the Other Parent:
This to me is probably the most important one to remember. You should never, no matter how angry you are, speak wrong of the other parent infront of your child. Children are like sponges and they will soak up every thing you say. When you talk down on their mother or father, it give them the idea that they should see their mother or father the same way. Problems between you and your other need to stay between you and them. Any time that my siblings and I were angry and tried to smart talk one of our parents, the other was quick to correct us. So to go along with watching what you say, it is also important to correct your child when they try to be rude.
All in all, you don't divorce your children. When you have children with someone a divorce doesn't strip you of your parenting duties. For the sake of the child I encourage you to push differences aside and show them that you are still a United force no matter what happened between you.
