We are only two months into 2016, and I have already heard this more times than I can handle without exploding. I hear it during class, I hear it walking around, I see it on the internet. What I am talking about is shaming people for asking.

Let me give a few examples.

Hearing a class moan when someone asks a (legitimate) question at the end of class, seeing someone bashing another for asking for help, someone getting upset when a friend gets a job or an opportunity that they did not; the list is sadly endless. Questions, at least when first posed, are harmless. People can say no, they can rebuttal, they can spend 20 minutes telling you why their answer is their answer. In all cases, you end up leaving with more information than you started with, leaving the uncertainty behind.

I think the best way to present my thoughts and feelings on this subject is case by case, but it all comes back to one thing — there are no good reasons one should ever feel bad for asking a question.

Let's go through some issues.

I don't want to be rejected or hear "no."

Now this is probably the biggest reason people do not tend to ask. I know I am currently sitting on a couple conversations myself because I am worried that hearing a negative response will hurt just a little too much.

This is OK — for a time. When you are preparing what you need to say, figuring out what you want to hear, how to pose your question, this all makes sense. However, when you have hit the point where all there is left to do is have a conversation, you are only hurting yourself and the situation by not saying anything. When sitting in a realm of uncertainty or helplessness, the best thing to do is get some answers.

You can't plan for every outcome, and you don't necessarily know how you will feel. The best thing you can do to feel better is to get it all out of your system and get some answers. Only then can you really know what to do next. And, hey, a yes is super possible too, so why wait for happiness? Whether it’s a job, a crush or a problem, get your answers and move on — you only have to ask.

I don't want to pressure someone into saying, "yes."

Are you someone who has a hard time saying no? If so, then I really understand why you feel this way. As someone who can often come off a bit too strong, I sometimes feel like my questions come off as demands or as arguments, and I really do understand this balance.

But not asking or posing questions with a "Maybe do you kinda want to, I mean, I don't really care; it's up to you" does not accurately express the intent of your question. Want to invite someone to an event because you want to hang out with them? Ask! Want to have a party? Invite! Want to offer someone a drink? Offer!

Everyone has the ability to say "no," and most will stick to their guns and not let one small question pressure them into something they don't want to do. Half-questions are really not any better because someone who is on the fence is not going to be helped by a bunch of maybes. While I will never condone coercing someone into something, this is not done by asking once, especially when you ask nicely and straightforward.

I don’t know if I am allowed to ask this question.

I once asked a friend whether her hair was real. For those of you who just gasped, yes I know, so sorry. But I did, and she yelled at me for quite a bit about why that was totally inappropriate, and I felt pretty awful. After the showdown, another friend of mine came and talked to me and told me that not everyone felt that way, and she was happy to talk about her hair, real or not.

We ended up having a great conversation about hair, and I learned that it was 100 percent OK for me to ask, and if someone didn’t want to share, then that was her prerogative. There are definitely inappropriate things to ask (I think back to "God, Karen, you can't just ask people why they're white!"), but if you don’t know, then a good first question is, "Is it OK if I ask a question about your hair?" People will tell you, and I bet you will learn a whole lot. So tread, with respect, and it will be fine.

I don't want to be seen as someone who needs help.

I hate to hear this because I think it is just awful that our culture has stigmatized help. Too often asking for help comes off as lazy or incompetent or not intelligent. However, this stigma is wrong. I mean if your TA is essentially doing your homework for you, there is a problem, but that is not going to be the case for someone who is legitimately worried about this.

No one who knows what they are doing is going to look down on you for asking for help because they have definitely asked before. No one gets to where they are in life without a little assistance, and it is often hard to admit so, but if you want to go far, go together. Meet with a professor, ask for someone to help you lift a box; ego is not worth a bad test or a broken back.

What I am asking for isn't important enough.

Yes, it is. It always is. If class is almost over if it is only important to you and not someone else, if it is not life or death, if someone might throw you shade for asking, it is important enough. I promise. There is nothing so unimportant that it is not worth a small question. There are definitely appropriate times and places (like OK, if you have a very personal question and you ask it after class is over and keep everyone there for another 10 minutes, that is not very kind. Ask after everyone is dismissed), but your question is still important. Please ask it. I want to answer; your professor wants to answer; your friends want to answer. Information is wonderful and people are usually very willing to share.

No one else is asking this question.

That is exactly why you should ask. How many times have you debated asking a question in class only to have someone else ask the exact same one later? Be that first person! If no one else is asking, I'll bet loads are thinking it and the others are the ones who haven't even noticed that there is something to be asked. Bring people's attention to issues, and do not be afraid to break the barrier and ask.

The last thing I want to talk about is what I call question envy. It goes something like this: One person wanted to ask something, didn't and saw someone else benefit from asking. The person then feels the need to defend their reasons for not asking, usually resulting in the post-question shaming of others or of just being rude to this person in general.

If you are someone who is not asking, and someone else does, please take it as a lesson to do ask instead of getting mad. You know better than anyone else how hard it must have been for that person to ask for a job, or a raise, or a better grade, and if you think you deserve it too, it is never too late to try.

So be bold, be observant and ask the questions you are dying to ask. We are waiting to hear you.