To the girl who can't help but unabashedly flirt with all men:
I am not here to shame you. Perhaps you can't help it. Your hands on their forearms and your girlish giggle are perhaps just ways that you show you're engaged in conversation. The way you jokingly say you love them and boss them around like a long-time lover are just your way of making friends. Again, I cannot possibly chastise your actions while knowing so little about the intentions behind them.
However...
When your flirtatious tendencies find themselves at the door of my relationship, I will quickly slam it in your face.
I am not a crazy controlling girlfriend, and I trust my fiance with my life (obviously). It's not the idea that he would ever cheat on me with you that crosses my mind and drives me to violent anger; it's the idea that you don't respect me enough as a fellow woman to realize you're crossing lines.
You are not his long-time best friend. You are not even his good friend. Therefore, it's not appropriate to text him about your life. It's not appropriate to hang on him in the halls at school. It's definitely not appropriate to talk to him like you're "BFF's"
Something I always believed in about relationships is that you have a right to have expectations. I expect that my partner will keep himself out of situations that make me *rightfully* uncomfortable. Unfortunately, that's not always possible. That's where classy women come in. If he is in a relationship, stop trying to get his attention. I'm not saying that he can never have another new female friend ever again. But I am saying that unless she shares in his love of beer, Magic the Gathering, cheese, or Shih Tzus, he probably shouldn't be spending too much of his precious time conversing with you.
Maybe I am controlling. But your reputation precedes you.
When I look at you, I see insecurity. Insecure people need validation. Most of the time, you have a boyfriend who validates and loves you. So why do you need my significant other to validate you as well?
He has his own classwork to focus on and doesn't have time to help you with yours. He can't sit by you in class because you don't take anything seriously, and he really needs to buckle down.
If you're looking for validation, seek elsewhere. If you're looking for a tutor, there are people who get paid to do that. If you're looking for someone to talk to, I'm all ears. But he doesn't have time for you.
This is an open letter to all females who can't help but insert themselves into the lives of men. Maybe guys are easier to be friends with than girls.Maybe you just like the attention. But my partner doesn't need another friend, and he is too busy paying attention to his work and me.
