Dear you,

The girl that makes sure everyone else is okay before yourself. The girl who pushes off studying for that big test to comfort your friend's broken heart. The girl who sees a tweet or Instagram post and is the first person to text and ask if they are okay. The girl who holds back her feelings just to be supportive of that new relationship. To the girl who keeps pushing for everyone else's happiness, but forgets about her own. The girl whose brain sometimes hurts from reading texts and emails for too long. The girl who is the advice-giver, but never receives any herself. The girl everyone goes to for a laugh. To the girl who sometimes just needs a break to take care of her own issues at home. The girl who loses hours of sleep just to make sure her best friend stops crying. The girl who has pain in her thumbs from typing endless paragraphs of advice. The girl that is so mentally exhausted from never taking care of herself. The girl that gives her all to everyone, no matter how tired she is. No matter what: you're that girl. The girl who is taking care of everyone else, but at the same time trying to keep your own happiness.

You aren't alone having those mini breakdowns in bed. Trust me, I get. I used to be you too. It isn't easy.

You feel bad if you tell them you're busy, right? Or feel bad going to bed when you know you saw the notification come up saying "I need advice." It becomes frustrating to give the same advice over and over, yet no one even listens. I get it. I've been there.

However, you need the be the girl who takes care of yourself before anyone else. It is not selfish. I worried I was being selfish for a long time, but the minute you realize you have to put yourself first, the quicker your happiness will come... and the longer it will stay.

I constantly was putting all my friends' happiness before my own. I was stressed, cried almost every night, and always wondering when I would get a break. Don't get me wrong; I love my friends and will always be there of them, but enough was enough. The constant stressing for that test or the feeling that my brain was going to explode had to stop. I had to finally put myself first.

Now you do too.

Stepping back for a little bit and getting your life together is okay. Not having time to give advice sometimes is okay. Ignoring that FaceTime call to get some sleep or spend more time with family is okay. Not carrying the weight on your shoulders all the time does not make you a selfish person or a bad friend. Putting yourself first is more than okay.

You are just as important as the friends you're helping. Feeling mentally and physically tired all of the time is not healthy. I promise you, by making sure you yourself are in good health is not being selfish. Your happiness comes first. Your grades come first. You must love yourself and be genuinely happy before you can take care of anyone else. "You," as much as anybody in the entire universe, "deserve your love and affection."

Love,

The girl who used to be you