10-year-old student: Do you have a boyfriend?
Him: YOU'RE CHEATING ON ME?!
Student reading an article about LaGuardia Airport:
"La Jiri Agada Airport was built in…"
10 year old: "Do you want me to show you the toy dog I sleep with?"
*Brings me a toy dog wrapped in a white towel and puts her on the desk*
Student (Whispering to the dog): If you fall, I'll be there to catch you really quickly.
Me dictating words to seven-year-old as he writes: "SHip, CHair"
Him: Be quiet for a minute.
6-year-old: "MOMMY, I HAVE A BOOGIE!!"
7-year-old moaning and groaning, reluctant to do his English homework. Looks at the floor:
"Hmm, the floor is dirty. I'll go get the vacuum!"
Girl holding cotton candy for the first time.
Her mom: Don't worry, it's not hair!
Me: "Sweetie, would you feel more comfortable if I speak to you in Russian or in English?"
Six-year-old: *Answering in English* I don't remember English.
Seven-year-old: The pencil got stuck between my toes...
11-year-old student: "I'll do one more question."
11-year-old: "Rock paper scissors?"
10-year-old: "Am I real? Are you real? What if this is all a dream?"
*Ten-year-old looks up from his math homework*
"I understand why women have nipples, its to feed the baby...but why do men have them?!"