If you're like me, you've made the decision to pursue an internship (or two) this summer. If you're even more like me, you're working close to home. If you're even MORE like me, your home is conveniently located 20 miles away from one of the largest (and I would argue greatest) cities in the world: New York City. It would be stupid to find a place to live in the Big Apple, considering it's a "quick" train/car ride away! Why live in the city when it's much cheaper and "easier" to live at home? "I'll just commute," you tell your friends/family/employer, "Piece of cake!"

Wrong.

Here is what a typical day looks like for a commuter (and these hold true of all cities, but especially for New York).

Stage 1: Waking Up

While seemingly pretty standard - everyone has to wake up - there is something different about having to wake up to commute. I usually take an 8:00 a.m. train to make my 9:30 a.m. job. And considering I need a little over an hour to shower, eat breakfast, collect myself, and drive to the train station... I usually have to wake up around 6:30/7:00 a.m. For a 9:30 start time! (Cue not sarcastic, totally serious and sympathetic violin.) But the worst part (as commuters know) is that you're waking up early just to sit on a train for 45 minutes. You are on a train; your PAID co-workers are sleeping. Ridiculous.

Stage 2: The Train

Every day, you have about a 50/50 shot of having a pleasant train ride. Firstly, it's rush hour, which means TONS of people (all in suits) boarding the train with you. Squeezing in that small door, rubbing shoulders with sweaty old guys, getting stepped on by business women in kitten heels and basically knocking people out of the way to get a seat... it's no picnic! So, you have a seat. Good job! But uh oh, that fat, sweaty guy is heading towards you... open seat next to you!

Put your bag on it quickly. Maybe he's too afraid to ask! What's he holding? OH GOD IT'S A BACONATOR. NO NO NO DON'T SIT NEXT TO ME you internally scream. *Plunk* He's down. And you're in the window seat. It would be rude to get up, plus you'd have to stand the whole time. Guess you're stuck here. Better make that 40/60.

Stage 3: Arriving At The Station

Seems like an unnecessary stage... says the non-commuter. Anyone who takes a train to Grand Central/Penn Station/etc. everyday knows this to be a vital and HORRIBLE stage of the morning. For whatever reason (and my guess is it has to do with the mechanics), the platforms are BOILING HOT every single morning. Combine the 90 degree temperature with hundreds of suited up adults moving at a glacial (honestly, slower than glacial) pace... and you've got a recipe for disaster. By the time you reach the terminal, you're probably drenched in your own sweat. Your perfectly done makeup is rubbing down your face, so you're going to look like a hot mess by the time you get to the office. Splendid.

Stage 4a: The Subway

I work at two different offices, each part time. To get to one of these offices (located in Union Square), I must take the subway (dun dun DUN). Now, normally I would find no issue with this. But you have to remember: rush hour. A sweaty, disgusting, chaotic hour right at the start (and end) of the work day. If you take the subway each morning, you have probably become very aware of your personal space and how frequently it is violated.

Last week, I had the pleasure of being pushed into the car by a bunch of anxious adults trying to get to work on time. As I was being shoved into the packed 4-train, I accidentally bumped a man next to me. "What the hell are you doing lady? Why the f*ck you gotta push people like that?" It's lovely conversations like these that make you wish your parents didn't buy into the whole "suburbs are better for raising children" thing.

Stage 4b: Walking

My other office is located about 15 minutes away from Grand Central. There is a subway stop in the building, which would make it easy for me to get there... but I think we can all agree that if you can avoid the subway, do. Plus it's summer. Why not enjoy the sun and fresh air? And while I'd do practically anything to get out of the rush hour subway, I can't honestly say that walking is pure bliss. Firstly, the crosswalks. Each time you cross, there are cars attempting to make right/left turns INTO YOU. They have no patience for you. They will edge up RIGHT against your leg if they are in a hurry. They'll honk, despite the walk sign encouraging you to move forward. And it's always somewhat of a guessing game as to whether you have enough red hand blinks to make it across. I say play it safe on this one. Don't try and run across at the last second. Secondly, other people. I hate other people.

Slow walkers, large families, tourists, people with suitcases (literally, why), and of course, the lovely construction workers. I don't want to stereotype that all construction workers cat-call and make inappropriate comments, but I have recently noticed this to be true. Even when walking with my father, I'll get the occasional whistle from a man crawling out of the sewer. Lovely. Other people also never realize the hurry you are in nor do they consider the ordeal you've been through already that morning. They are slow. They are worthless. They are annoying.

(Keep in mind, these are my thoughts pre-coffee.)

Stage 5: Arriving At The Office

If you're lucky, you've arrived on time, clean. If you're normal, you've arrived 5-10 minutes late, drenched in your own sweat, makeup running down your face, hair knotted/damp, heaving.

Your boss gives you a forced smile as you walk to your desk and pull out your personal fan, downing bottles of water. If you're me, you've brought body spray, hand sanitizer, a hairbrush, deodorant, moisturizer, etc. You need them all.

And here's the best part. Even though you've been up for 3 hours, your 8-hour work day has just begun. YAY SUMMER!