I've been graduated from college for almost two months now, and it might be the toughest two months of my life. We all go to college to get an education, to hopefully, get ahead in the world. We work tirelessly for two or four years, to get a degree in a field that we're passionate about. We get our Horizons broadened and ourselves encouraged by the people around us, hearing that we are the future. However, that euphoric feeling of walking across the stage and grabbing your degree is abruptly ended by the harsh smack of reality.
Reality, the fact of being out in the real world and how scary it may be, seems to have hit me hard. I'm a disabled man, as many reading this article will know. I have always prided myself on fighting and never giving up. I have always believed in not letting my physical limits hold me back. All my life I've had to prove people wrong and I have done just that. However, this time seems to be different for me. Fear of failure has consumed my heart and that might be the most dangerous thing of all.
So many questions running through my mind, as I'm sure they do with every college graduate. What if I'm not good enough? what if I never succeed? What am I going to do about my student loans? What if I'm living at my parents house for the rest of my life? All of these thoughts cloud our minds and cripple our spirits. In the back of our minds we know that this train of thought, this way of thinking is absolutely illogical and senseless. Yet, we torment ourselves anyway.
For the past two months, the amount of time I've taken to job search hasn't been nearly enough. The amount of time that I've taken, the steps I have taken to follow my dreams has been miniscule. It has not been from lack of time or anything of the sort. However, it has been from a sense of fear, the fear of failure. Over the past few days and while writing this article I have realized something that I've known all along. If you fear failure enough to let it consume you, then you are destined to fail. Life is not a race or sprint it's not about who can get a job first. It's not even about who can get the best job that pays the most money. What it is about is reaching your personal goals and dreams, following your expectations, no one else's. Life is a hard, hard road full of twists and turns and many bumps. Being disabled might give me a few more bumps in the road, but it doesn't mean that I can't just drive right over them with a little extra foot on the gas.
