I wasn’t sure whether or not I wanted to write this article because I know that it can be difficult to bring up past memories of loved ones. Still, I want to talk about my grandma, who passed away exactly one year ago today. Her name was Evelyn Richards, and she was my hero in this lifetime. She lived an extraordinary life, and it was not because of anything she accomplished. Her life was extraordinary because she did something that very few of us do well. She listened.

I cannot even begin to name the countless people who told me that when you spoke to her, it was like she fully understood you. And you may not have even known her that well. She would listen to you, absorb your feelings and words and not judge you for what you said. She was so focused on loving you, the person, that she would not walk away from you because of something you had done. Instead, she drew closer to the weak, the broken, the angry, or the foolish, and she became their confidante. Yet at the same time, she kept you accountable for your actions. Because she loved you, she was direct and addressed each person with a firm love. After listening attentively, she was not afraid of speaking the truth because she spoke out of love.

How did she become such a patient, strong and incredible woman? She looked to God. She lived life pursuing a relationship with God. This relationship led her to accept that life is ultimately transient, but heaven is coming soon. Due to this mindset, she didn’t find her security in wealth or connections, in how she dressed or the way she was perceived by others. Instead, she ceaselessly gave her time, money, and energy to people in need. She invested countless moments of her precious life into other people and even found joy in it. The crazy thing is that few of us realized how much she actually invested until she finally had to leave us.

I remember sitting alone in my room one year ago from today, trying to think about how I could describe the feeling. The only way I can put it into words is like this: when she left, I felt like part of myself had departed. Part of me was unfilled, empty. My grandma spent so much time listening and absorbing my life into hers in order to know me better that she ultimately became like me for my sake. When she died, it was like she took a little piece of me with her.

I did a lot of thinking after she died, wondering who could possibly fill her shoes now that she was gone. Then, it hit me. While her passing was a loss, it was also an opportunity to grow and step up to the plate. I felt a glorious burden to take up the challenge to follow in her shoes and emanate the characteristic she so greatly displayed: listening.

In this world where we constantly speak and talk over one another, listening has even more power to affect change. Whether you are still in high school, finishing college, starting a new family, enjoying retirement, etc., listening applies to you. If we could each be more intentional about how we respond to the people with whom we come in contact, then maybe we could start filling this world with more Evelyns. Maybe after our deaths, our friends and family would be challenged to start living differently. While we will never know how greatly our life impacted the people around us, we can learn from those who went before us. And we can seek to follow their examples.