In the past few years, there’s been an overload of articles and studies claiming your birth order defines your personality and your life. Whether or not your birth order decides your fate is debatable. However, there’s no denying that there are certain traits you can’t help but acquire due to your spot in the family — especially for those of us at the top of the sibling tree. Being the eldest has its difficulties and its advantages. At the top of the list is getting to go to college first, therefore escaping our sibling responsibilities for at least one school year. Despite our freedom from our eldest duties (at least from the daily ones), we can’t help but shake some of those characteristics picked up. If you’re the oldest sibling, chances are that your friends can tell.
1. You’re overprotective.
You’ve spent your whole life looking out for your younger siblings, and now you can’t help but do the same for your friends. So, while everyone else is simply trying to console a friend after a breakup, it’s likely you’re the first to have a temper flare-up. While your friends may appreciate your passionate “who does he think he is” cries, they probably won’t appreciate you actually asking the heartbreaker when you spot him across the cafeteria.
2. You’re the boss(y one).
The thing about being the eldest is that you were thrown into a leadership position despite having no prior experience. Your whole life has been spent telling your sibling(s) what to do. Now that being in charge is part of your personality, it’s hard to hold back. Granted, sometimes your leadership is desired (why is it you’re the only person who can ever decide where to eat?), you sometimes struggle to let other people have a say.
3. You’re the advice guru.
The older you and your siblings got, the more advice you seemed to be doling out. Constantly being the go-to for your sibs gave you a certain confidence about sharing what you know. While other friends may stray from getting involved, you give your advice in an easygoing manner that makes you the source of wisdom among the group. Sure, the 3 a.m. freak out texts over a bad grade drive you a little crazy, but deep down, you love being needed.
4. You’re the reliable one.
No matter how carefree and fun-loving you are, being responsible for keeping your siblings alive made you…well, responsible. Your friend skipped lecture? You have the notes. No one remembers when that history exam is? You have it written down. You always know right where you’re supposed to be and when you’re supposed to be there — even if you’re running to make it.
5. You’re understanding.
No matter your personality or the dynamics of your family, there’s one thing every eldest sibling can agree on — pressure. You were always expected to do well and set an example. Even though your parents loved you, flaws and all, and even through your rebellious phase, you always felt like you were striving for perfection. In college, everyone faces so much pressure. You have to do well in your courses, be involved, score that internship or job, and it feels like it never stops. When friends feel like they’re going to buckle under that weight, there you are. You throw an arm around their shoulders and tell them that you’ve been there, that you understand, and they know that you do. Any group of friends is lucky to have an eldest sibling in the mix.
