STOP. Stop comparing yourself to others as no one has ever said anything truer than when Mark Twain proclaimed that,"Comparison is the death" of joy. We all know what it feels like, I've been there and you've been there, but why do we do it and how to we stop it?
STOP idolizing others, no one is superhuman, or percent, or flawless or any of those abstract adjectives that can never be reflected in one person. When we idolize others we put them on a false pedestal that we will always be trying to climb up on but will reach because it is not there, and this unbelievable goal is crushing for your self-esteem. Forget about wanting his intelligence, her athleticism, or their relationship these things are not yours
We are all different (obviously) you excel in many areas of life that others do not. May you're a wiz at math, maybe you wake up with flawless hair, maybe you have great leadership skills. While it may be tempting to try and emulate others till the point of obsession, don't. You're not them, you're you.
It's okay to admire others and to be motivated by things they do and qualities that have we grow by observing others and imitating them like out parents and our teachers. But have you ever wanted to be your parent's so bad that you've gotten anxious or depressed? Probably not.
Like many, comparisons are my biggest downfall, on any given day I'll compare myself to many people, my best friends, people who are still in the library after I quit for the night, my peers who seem to be going harder at the gym than I did. It's hard to turn off the chatter in my head that tells me that I'm not good enough and sometimes my days and even weeks will be overshadowed by the squeezing pressure in my chest that I'm not good enough.
However, last Christmas I read Amy Poehler's book Yes Please and one very short line changed my perspective on everything in a very big way. She was discussing, much like me the danger of comparison and said that in her life when she feels herself comparing herself to others she'll think, "Good for her! not for me" (or him).
I feel that this line is applicable to everyone and it really helps to remind you that everyone is different and are on different tracks in their life. Something that is good for one person is not always something that is good for another. We all have different personalities and we need to respect that when we observe others but also when we try and project those observations onto ourselves. We must endeavor to bring joy into our lives, not kill it.
