Southern women are different; that is a fact. We are all connected to deeper roots and banded together by a history that provides us with the expectations and the rules that come along with being a lady from the South. These rules are not written down; a girl learns them by watching their mother, aunts, and grandmothers.

There are many good and bad stereotypes surrounding the South especially when it comes to women. In today’s world a southern belle can come in many forms, she is just as likely to join the military as she is to be having brunch at the Country Club, but the basic template stays the same. No one can truly understand the culture that comes along with being from the South unless you have lived there and been part of it. From years of watching my mother here are a few things that l have learned make a Southern woman.

We are eloquent.

You think before you talk and if you do not have anything nice to say, then do not say anything at all, and this is something we learn at a young age. We grew up watching our mothers never meet a stranger; she had the ability to become best friends with the person in front of her in line at the grocery store. The gift of gab is a skill that we acquire over time and perfect through the years, and it is key to charming everyone that we come in contact with. I can promise you we will get any valuable information from anyone we need. We believe in being polite, even if it kills us. So, the common Southern phrase of “Bless your heart” can either be a form of empathy and a huge hug or it is the sweetest insult you could ever give someone. Also, we all know those girls who “sew their clothes” or “have a great personality.”

We are strong

Southern beauty has been catching the eyes of men for ages and has been stirring jealousy among women since the “Gone with the Wind” times. There is something about true Southern beauty that cannot be applied with a mascara brush. The strength of a Southern woman is versatile and requires a pinch of toughness and a splash of femininity. My grandmother once said that strength can be found in the sweetest places. From years of patience and learning Southern ladies have perfected the balance between tough and nice; we have learned that one does not have to be sacrificed for the other. We just have to know when to use each one and still manage to look fabulous while doing it.

Family and friends come first.

We fight and we make up, and then we do it all again. We butt heads, but there is nothing a hand-written “I’m sorry” note cannot fix. We will always be there for each other and will have each other’s backs whether we are right or wrong. We are tight knit, and we know that we are nothing without our family and friends. We all know we are crazy and a little dysfunctional but that's just part of being a woman, right?

I think my favorite depiction of a Southern woman is to think of her like a pearl. A pearl is lovely and beautiful, but they start out as an irritation. They are protected by their shell, but over time, a pearl is gently polished and formed from its rough edges and becomes a seamless and radiant pearl. A pearl shapes itself into something beautiful inside a hard and imperfect shell. The forming within the shell is not without pain and frustration but in the end, the pearl becomes a beautiful and timeless object.