When someone first finds out that I struggle with depression usually one of the first things that will escape their mouth is, “you don’t seem depressed.”
I’ve actually been told, “you are the happiest person that I know.”
Inside I know it’s not true but on the outside, I hold my camouflage.
They may be right, I might not seem depressed but there are some things that they are missing without a doubt between my changing patterns to blend with surroundings there are tells that may not be so obvious to see.
Depression is more than the stigmatized elephant in the room depression is the chameleon. Instead of making itself easily discernable it hides, it blends into society. It makes the battle a lone battle fought between human and mind.
So how do we spot this chameleon before it’s too late?
We L.O.V.E.
L- Listen: We don’t just hear what people say we actively listen not just for cues that show something is off but we listen to show that we care. We don’t condemn, we don’ t make light of a situation, we listen and we love.
O- Observe: We look for clues that may show that things are going downhill. The hard part is these clues may be different for every person but if we listen and pay attention to the small things we may see the smile that quickly fades into a frown or the, I’m just tired turning into most of the day being spent in bed. We can observe the scratches that are just from the dog becoming more frequent and the laugh that is quickly cut off. It is essential that we pay attention because we may miss something very important.
V- Vent: Give them the opportunity to vent and share their struggles and the thoughts that may be plaguing their mind and during these opportunities be sure you are listening and observing to see if there is a glimmer of change in the chameleon.
E- Encourage: Encourage them don’t just tell them that everything is going to be ok but take action to help them understand that they aren’t alone and that you care.
Love as a word may be something that scares them but use action to help them see that love doesn’t have to be just a word but an acronym that unmasks the lie to show the truth underneath.
In this practice of L.O.V.E., you show them that they don't have to hide and that’s most of the battle.
Remember actions speak louder than words especially to those who hurt.
You are not alone.
Spread awareness and spread L.O.V.E.
