If you are anything like me, you are no stranger to avoiding your problems. In fact, your first instinct is to likely run in the opposite direction at any given sign of confrontation or stress. It is no surprise that, dependent upon the stage of your life in which you are circulating, certain circumstances tend to cause us more stress and anxiety than others. Initially, it is rather easy to remove yourself from the never-ending stressfulness that serves as a roadblock in your path to happiness. Yet, in our hearts, we know that stress never removes itself from our lives on its own.
After countless repetitions of putting requirements off until the last minute, attempting to be the bigger person in a confrontational situation, or simply not showing up to events that are seemingly too much for me, I have learned that these temporary solutions are no ways to deal with stress. In actuality, the best way to deal with stress is to acknowledge its presence in your life and accept it.
As I favor procrastination above most things, I have come to the realization that it intensifies my stress levels to their extremes. At certain points in my life, I believed that I worked best under pressure. As I can happily say that I can, in fact, complete an assignment successfully while having left it to the last minute, the aggravation of it looming over my head until the eleventh hour is a sense of stress that I can no longer keep up with. Though it is often difficult to find the motivation to be proactive with regards to schoolwork and finals, I am coming to understand that it is the best thing for my health. By accepting that my responsibilities will only continue to linger until I complete them, I feel more determined to complete them in a timely manner and alleviate personal stress.
In my personal experience, this same idea of the acceptance of stress is applicable to friendships and relationships that are upsetting your everyday experience. At one time, I believed that confronting a person if you are upset with them would lead to the ultimate deterioration of a friendship or a relationship. I often labeled the term "confrontation" with a negative connotation, as I thought each conversation had to be supported on the basis of aggression in order to explain my feelings. The older I am getting, the more I am coming to realize that this idea is anything but true. If a person you care about is contributing to your stress, there are polite ways to address the situation while still standing firm in your beliefs.
It is acceptable to let someone know that they have hurt you, but this does not mean a simple conversation will be the demise of a friendship or relationship. If you and the person you are connecting with truly care for one another, you will find a way to reach a compromise and work to better the situation overall. By accepting the idea that confrontation can be worded kindly and may have positive results, you are working to alleviate your personal stress.
This is not to say that there will not be times in which you feel you need to take a step back from a situation in order to regulate your personal stress. I have been involved in many extracurriculars throughout my college career, and I have found a sense of happiness that I once lacked. Yet, there are times where I know that I am overworking myself and committing to what seems to be an abundance of events at once. At one time, my initial response was to excuse myself from an event if my stress levels were at an uncomfortable, distracting level.
Yet, I am coming to realize the significance and the importance of commitment. Although many stressful situations arise unexpectedly, it is crucial to recognize when you might be putting too much on your plate. In order to avoid cancellations that may create even more stress, it is imperative to manage your time well and recognize that you may not be able to commit to everything. You can only do your best to contribute as much as you can to the people and things that you care for, but when it begins to affect your health and your stress levels, you must be able to accept the fact that you need a break from the situations at hand.
Though stress is consistently found in our everyday lives, you must not let it get the better of you. By being in touch with your time, your commitments and your emotions, you will have a more intuitive sense of how to regulate and accept the stress that you are facing.
