Okay, so Fox's new show "Scream Queens" is a little bit campy. OK, so it might be more than just a little bit campy, but damn is Chanel Oberlin fierce. In the few episodes that have aired, The leader of the Chanels and Kappa Kappa Tau has said some of the best lines on tv that I have heard in a while.
1. What fresh hell is this?
I don't know how Chanel comes up with her signature quotes, but this is definitely a nicer way of straight out saying "WTF?"
2. Good evening, idiot hookers.
I legit laughed out loud when I heard this. I'm not sure what makes the pledges idiots or hookers or idiot hookers, but Chanel has no regrets about greeting her pledges.
3. If any of you bitches die while protecting a sister, you're allowed to skip the rest of hell week.
I'll admit, I wasn't really paying attention when she said this and I had to go back to make sure I heard her correctly. I'd rather participate in hell week than die, but I do get her point.
4. Good morning, sluts.
Idiot hookers and sluts—must be great to be one of Chanel's loyal followers.
5. What was I supposed to do? "True Tori" was over.
Finally! Someone else who watches Tori Spelling's numerous reality shows. I knew I was going to like Chanel.
6. You don't get STDs from blood oaths, you get STDs from drinking the water in Mexico.
Someone needs to teach homegirl a lesson.
7. You're about to get hazed harder than a suburban banquet hall during Bat Mitzvah season.
As someone who has seen many of these "hazed" suburban banquet halls during Bat Mitzvah season, to simply put it, I relate to this.
8. Maybe. But I'm rich and I'm pretty, so it doesn't really matter.
There's no denying it, Chanel has confidence, and no one can take that away from her.
9. Congratulations, stupid hippos.
I'm sure if I were drinking anything when I heard this, it would have came shooting out of my mouth. Does this make calling someone a stupid hippo an appropriate insult for me to use?
10. I will destroy you, bitch.
Without a doubt, this Chanel has probably used this line many times in her life.
11. Ugh, let's go get some pizza.
This has to be the nicest thing on the list, and you know what, a slice of pizza sounds great.