I have two definitions when it comes to defining “Friends with Benefits”

The first one is the book definition; a friend that you are allowed to have sexual activity with but no true relationship is formed. No feelings attached.

Then there is the TRUE definition of a FWB; Two friends who think it would be fun to have sex with each other over and over until one catches feelings and gets their heart broken because the other does not want a relationship.

A few weeks ago, I could never picture myself being FWB with anyone. Mainly because I get attached really fast and I care too much for people. I was always taught that sex is a very intimate act and that it should be cherished, not just shared with a random person that you just met a few days ago.

As I get older, FWB is becoming a more and more popular trend. More people are wanting just sex instead of a relationship.

I always wondered how lonely that must be. Having sex that isn’t out of love, just lust.

But up until now, I don’t have to wonder anymore.

When people say that college changes you, they aren’t lying. When I look back on my first week at college, I wonder how I changed so much in such a little time. Maybe it’s environmental influences, maybe I just lost myself completely, or maybe I changed out of pure loneliness.

As I was sitting downstairs talking to the Office Manager of my dorm building the other night, I started to reflect on my life more than usual. Was I losing myself or was this the beginning of finding myself? Who knows.

I agreed to a FWB because I was tired of doing stuff for other people all the time. I was going to do this for me, I deserved to do something for me.

With the thought, “We only grow in discomfort” in mind, I went for it.

And honestly, I do not regret it.

I know that’s weird to say but it’s true. During this escapade, I found a side of myself that I didn’t know existed. A side full of adventure and excitement, something that I have definitely been lacking in life.

I don’t want this article to come across as a glimpse into my sex life, because that is not my intent. What I’m trying to say through writing this, is that this new experience is something that I thought I would never do in my life. Somehow this experience taught me how to be more confident in myself and to not be scared to go after the things I want in life.

One of the main reasons that I am sharing such a personal glimpse of my life with the internet, is because there were multiple times where I wished I had someone to talk to, but didn’t. Now, I’m definitely not saying to go out and have a random FWB, but I am saying to step outside of your comfort zone every once in a while. Life may take you by surprise.