You thought you were done with the ABCs when you went off to college, but the truth is your ABCs are here to haunt you.
A is for Aramark. Our splendid food supplier, who also supplies to prisons. You can always be sure to get some fresh veggies straight out of the freezer bag!
B is for the Barn, or the Pumphouse if you're one of those. It's the nightlife place of choice for every Tuesday and Thursday. It's also the only option.
C is for CLP's (Cultural Life Programs). Seriously, why do we have these? I'm 99.99 percent sure Harvard doesn't. Not to mention we have to attend 32 of them, averaging about 40 hours of our lives. Not casual.
D is for Dean's list. One of the most elitist communities. It's like everyone is an A-list actor or actress and are checking for their golden globe nominations.
E is for Einstein's where the bagels are fabulous, but the people that work there are so rude that you never want to go.
F is for functions. There may be only a small amount in comparison to every other school with Greek life, but that just makes them more highly anticipated!
G is for Greek Life. One of the only things that give Furman students an outlet to have fun with their friends. Although if you were to read all the rules attached, you would probably still be reading at graduation.
H is for homework. Isn't that supposed to decrease when you get into college? Furman takes the usually phony phrase of "one hour of class is equivalent of three to five hours outside of class" to another level.
I is for ICE. Other than midterms and finals, the ICE release is the number one cause of high blood pressure and anxiety attacks in Furman students. It's practically a proven statistic.
J is for James B. Duke. What would we do without him? Probably nothing. We all know Furman students complain about how much work we have more than we are actually doing work.
K is for apartment 'K'. The most sought after apartment complex on campus. It's private, fun, and legendary. All single bedrooms too. Who wouldn't want to live there?
L is for the Furman Lake. Props to the body of water for making our campus look so bougie even in the midst of all those dirty birds. Also for providing trees and shade for all of Furmans' frequent eno-ers.
M is for Monty's. The place to be when you want to hang with a large group. A lax establishment with a good time lurking in every dirty corner.
N is for nobody left behind. You will know almost everybody walking around campus. Bad hair days aren't for hats, their for hiding in your room because the second you leave, is the second you will see everybody you know and don't want to see in a matter of five minutes.
O is for open door policy. No one locks their doors on this campus. Even after multiple security threats over the last few years, including the motorcycle knife man.
P is for P-den points -- your only savior from the terrors of the DH and the food poisoning from the paddock.
Q is for queso. It seriously seems to be in everybody's top three favorite foods at Furman.Try it at TacoSushi for the most perfect cheese experience.
R is for Rick. The infamous DH worker. Even people who have never frequented the DH know this man. What a guy.
S is for the Swamp Rabbit Trail. One of the biggest selling points of Furman. Go on a tour and its location will be drilled into your head. Once you attend Furman however, you somewhat forget it exists if you don't belong to the cross country team. It is now known for its reputation for being the site of the Greek row that is rumored to be in the 10-year plan.
T is for transfer. Every true Furman student has had their transfer moment or semester. Good thing Furman makes it absolutely impossible to transfer due to the strange classes, because it isn't too bad when you stick around.
U is for underloading. One of the most blissful things you can do for your sanity and semester in general. It's everybody on campus' favorite thing to do. No one is concerned with making up the credits either while saving their GPA's is of main concern.
V is for Vinings. The only other housing choice apart from North Village. It is always the toss up between the social life or the nice housing.
W is for wellness concepts. Who on earth thought they would have to take "gym" class in college? Most of us didn't even have gym in high school.
X is for x-treme sleep deprivation. Something no Furman student has gone without experiencing.
Y is for the number of times you ask yourself why. Why do I have this much homework? Why does syllabus week exist? Why are there so many patches of dirt but no parking spots? And so on.
Z is for zero free time. You can not expect to wake up lazily on a Sunday morning or come home for a long restful afternoon nap without putting yourself horribly behind schedule.
