Remembering how we used to do our makeup is quite nostalgic and cringe-worthy.
Makeup has slowly consumed our entire lives, although we may not have noticed. The days of happy bank accounts, organized desks, and sanity are long gone. Fortunately, we have adapted to the dynamic makeup trends and learned how to survive maneuvering through them. Thanks, Darwin! So here's to remembering the good ole' days and where we all started.
Phase 1: The Apathetic and Uninterested.
Your trips to Sephora and Ulta are sporadic. When you do decide to venture inside, you only grab what you need and then you’re out. What’s the big deal about makeup anyway? Your makeup routine consists of mascara and lip gloss. You don't need anything else. No one has time for that.
Phase 2: The Rookie.
While you’re browsing through Youtube, you spot an eye-catching thumbnail for a Jaclyn Hill, Jeffree Star, or Nikki Tutorials makeup video. You question how a video about makeup could be 20 minutes long and wonder how you’re going to sit through the whole thing. Surprisingly, the video flies by and you feel pretty enlightened (and maybe a just a tiny bit dumb).
.
Phase 3: The Scientist.
You start watching makeup tutorials more frequently and begin trying some of the techniques for yourself. Although your work looks NOTHING like what the beauty gurus achieve, you still give yourself credit for attempting - even if you do turn out looking like a hot mess. Practice makes perfect, right?
Stage 4: The Bookworm.
Tired of not knowing what the beauty gurus are talking about, you educate yourself on some makeup terminology. Now you understand that beating your face doesn’t actually mean physically harming yourself, and that a swatch isn’t just a watch.
Stage 5: The Big League.
When you finally feel like you’re ready for the big leagues, you go out and buy your first expensive foundation (the one the beauty gurus are raving about) only this time, you don’t leave when you’ve found what you came for. Instead, you roam around and begin testing out new highlighters, lipsticks, and palettes. This results in your entire arm being covered in swatches. The only problem is when you fall in love with a color, you can’t remember the name because you’ve swatched a little too many.
Stage 6 - The Sofa Spud: Makeup videos start to consume your life and you’re running out of videos to watch. Halfway through a 2014 makeup haul by Manny MUA, you realize you’ve already seen it… three times. Once you've had enough of rewatching old videos, you have to find some other way too busy yourself, as you wait for the newest upload to satisfy your obsession. Maybe you'll go clean your brushes for once. When was the last time you cleaned them, anyway?
Stage 7: The Pro.
You’ve finally caught on to beating your face to the gods. While you still think your beat isn’t up to Instagram baddie standards, it’s looking pretty darn good. You have enough foundations to last you a lifetime – not to mention your collection of lipsticks and liquid lips. You can finally create a wing sharp enough to cut someone, AND you can do it in a matter of seconds.
Stage 8: The Big Spender.
So many packages arrive at your door that you can’t seem to remember what you even ordered. You start to find palettes in your drawers that you forgot you even had and you start having triplets of the same color lipstick. False eyelashes can be found all throughout your house which you constantly mistake as spiders.
Although it has been quite a long hard road, it's paid off big time. It shows in our gloriously beat faces with highlight bright enough to blind someone. We do realize that we may have a tiny problem with makeup, but hey, at least we accept it.
It could be worse.
