'Tis the season for my 20th year of life. Yet, I feel like my role as a teenager is not yet complete. I make mistakes every single day and definitely don't have a five-year plan. I don't have my life in order yet and I am still searching for a sense of self and purpose.
With every passing day, my role as a teenager fades away and my time to mature and take on independence comes full swing. At times that often sounds hideous and frightening, but it doesn't have to be. Here are six phases you go through when you leave your teens behind.
1. Denial
I look at my 16-year-old brother and wonder what happened to those childhood years of playing Monopoly and watching movies in our basement? I read about my high school basketball team in the newspaper and crave to be standing on the sidelines wearing the cheerleading uniform. Childhood was uncomplicated and blissful. Qualities you wish to have in your life now. But, you don't want to say goodbye to your youth just because you're 20.
2. Self-doubt
When you're 20, can you acceptably watch Disney movies and sing to the "High School Musical" soundtrack? If not, I'm screwed. You are fearful you will forget to pay rent and complete other adult-like tasks. You don't know if you can be a functioning adult.
3. Loss of Sanity
Turning 20 means you are that much closer to having to pay back your student loans. Yikes!
4. Navigation
Entering your 20s involves navigation. You have to navigate your way through life's challenges like you always have in years prior. You search until you find what you are looking for. In your 20s, this may be: a job, a career, a committed relationship and yourself.
5. Eagerness
Twelve months, 365 days and 8,760 hours until you can buy $2 beers at your favorite Mexican restaurant.
6. Acceptance
I am turning 20. I am no longer a teenager. Mistakes will be made. Friends will come and go. Situations will be encountered. Complications will arise. Milestones will be crossed. Hearts will be broken. Hold on, get ready and go for it. No one is ever going to be ready for the craziness life leaves for us. That's okay. Accept that you are here, on this earth with the people around you, right now in this moment and embrace it, all of it.
My 19th year of life was overflowing with many fond and heart-breaking moments and discoveries. I just discovered what it was like to navigate through an airport and fly alone. It was an awarding discovery and a stepping stone into my adult life. I walked into the airport with my luggage in hand and a smile on my face. I turned around to see my family seated in the vehicle and not walking with me for the very first time. I jumped vigorously up and down waving goodbye because I knew this was it: the moment of traveling alone, my moment of growing up.
I have high expectations for my 20s. I desire to make my life significant. It is time to accept growing up and own my individuality and everything that it encompasses. That doesn't mean I have to give up my youth. I am still young and forever will be young in my mind. I am still going to ask, "What's that on your shirt?" and poke noses when people look down.
Twenty has arrived. Make a wish and enjoy your twenties.
