Sometimes, growing up also means moving on. Some friends grow up and mature with each other, and some mature at different times. For some people, that's a hard concept to accept. For others, it's simple.
The thing about friendship after high school is that it takes two people to make the effort to continue the friendship. You don't see each other every day anymore. It's now up to you whether or not you see your friend. If it seems one-sided, the friendship isn't worth keeping any longer because it feels as if the other friend doesn't seem to care too much about your life. You feel that if you stopped texting them, they wouldn't even notice.
But, if all it took was one text saying, "I miss you! Whenever you want to hangout, I'm down!" and you guys actually hang out, it's great to reconnect with people you lost during the past few years after high school. Those people are worth keeping around. Especially if it's as if you guys never stopped being friends when you reunite.
There are 4 types of high school friends you have after high school:
1. The good friend that you never lost connection with, even if you both went to different colleges
Since you guys mainly see each other some weekends and holiday breaks, Snapchat is probably your main form of communication besides texting. Ugly selfies, dog pics, and random Snapworthy moments keep you guys laughing. You keep each other updated on life and always tend to make plans before returning back home. This friend may have made new friends, texts you less frequently, and seems like they're having hella fun without you, but you both know as soon as it's time to come home, you'll be reunited and it feels so good.
2. The friend that was your best friend in high school and still is
Things just haven't really changed. You just don't do life without them. Sure, you've both made new friends in college but no one is like this best friend. No one could replace this friend. No matter the situation, your friend is there, whether over the phone or face-to-face. You used to chit chat about people from high school and the things you loved and hated about that place. But, the conversation now focuses on the "now" and the future. You both know so much about each other if you went on a game show called "Do You Know Your Best Friend?" you'd win the grand prize by a landslide. This friend is worth keeping around for life.
3. The friend that completely stopped talking to you after high school and now only likes your Instagram pictures and Facebook statuses
In this day and age, that is considered "keeping up" with your friend. Because you do get to see a glimpse into their life with social media. But, that's not really a good way to maintain friendships, obviously.
It's good to know that friend still cares enough to stop scrolling to see what you've posted, but wouldn't it be better if they texted you, "Oh, that pic is so cute! We need to catch up! What days are you usually free"?
The answer is sometimes... depends...Is it that creepy kid from math class who sat behind you smelling your hair? Or is it the friend you used to sit beside and gossip in class with? You decide.
4. The friend that changed after high school
We all change after high school. But, there's a difference between growing up and changing into someone you're not (or someone you claimed you'd never be.) This friend stayed your friend after high school, but that friend started to take a toll on you. They're not the fun-loving person they used to be, they may even be only focused on themselves. But again, we all change after high school. We can't control the route that friend takes and we can't tell them what to do and what not to do. All we can do is tell them how we feel and then accept them if they still aren't the person you used to love spending time with. But that doesn't mean you have to be their friend. It hurts, but if you're putting yourself first, you know it's for the better.
People come and go in life. It's not necessarily easy, especially if they've been around for longer than a few years. But, we run our own lives and we make our own choices, life takes us wherever we want it to. That's inevitable.
Along the way, the friend you thought you'd never lose may walk away -- and make it look easy -- but it's up to you if it's worth hurting over or worth moving on from. 9 times out of 10, it's the latter.
To the friends I've lost along the way to either college life, to making new friends and forgetting about the old, to change... I'll still be rooting for you. Just know, it wasn't easy letting go.
