Not all of us are so fortunate as to know exactly what we want. These normal levels of indecisiveness are manageable, however when it comes to the more important decisions in a person’s life, like deciding on a major in college, these unsure students can spin off into a whirlwind of "What The Heck Am I Doing," a sad and confusing place for a young adult who just wants to figure it all out... fast. The following narrative describes the sentiments of an indecisive liberal arts student during these trying times (and is loosely based on my own notorious progression through almost every major offered at my university.)
1. It’s the very first day of your freshman year. You’re a prospective Economics major because: Most parents approve of that right? And economics is all about money, so that’s totally good to know. Economics sounds great. I like math, but not too much math. This is so right I can feel it.
2. A couple weeks in, you’ve got some conversations under your belt and word on the street is that no one really likes Economics. You could be one of those finance people, follow the golden path to investment banking, but that’s pretty hard and almost impossible to like. I guess I wasn’t that attached to Economics and it does seem kind of dry. There’s got to be something more enjoyable… Let’s just have a look at the list again.
3. Then Politics sounds like a good option. Well, this is definitely pretty close to economics, so it’s not time to freak out yet. Plus, there’s more of a social component in Politics, which means it’s more interesting, right? And there’s less math...
4. You’re absolutely gung-ho about being a Politics major and decide to read up on some of the latest political 411 while in line at Starbucks. Who are all of these people? I’ve never heard any of these names before. Since when is Obama a Socialist? Wait, I literally know nothing about politics. Oh, “Gerrymandering,” I remember that… and… Okay, nope. Next.
5. After five hours in the library that Sunday studying up for your first big test, you go back to your dorm to relax a little before going to bed. You watch "Grey’s Anatomy," obviously. Doctors are so cool, honestly. I mean look at that. I want to be a cardiothoracic surgeon. Let’s just look at the Pre-Med requirements. It can’t hurt…
6. It hurt. Seeing all of those math and science classes reminded you that you barely liked AP Chem in high school anyways. So that’s definitely a “No.” Plus, I’m pretty sure I got a little queasy the last time that I saw blood and McDreamy isn’t even real. Okay, that was definitely a weird stage for me. No Pre-Med.
7. A few weeks later, you call your dad while walking to your next class just to catch up. He tells you about a program he watched on the History Channel the night before about the progression of steam engine technology throughout the 19th century. Well that sounds absolutely wretched and boring, but other parts of history are cool. I always liked reading about the American Revolution and the Civil Rights Era. So maybe I could just, like, focus on those. History it is!
8. As it turns out, you can’t only study the American Revolution and the latter half of 20th century America. Well, great.
9. You can, however, study Art History. Sure, it’s on most of the published “Top Ten” lists for worst majors, but it’s like studying history in a way that’s way more interesting and I’ve always loved art. I think it’s perfect. Good. To. Go.
10. You’ve officially decided your major. You settle into bed at night, satisfied with a hard day’s work of careful contemplation and self-discovery. You pick up a book and start reading, all curled up with your cozy socks and a cup of tea. Is this what English majors get to do? This is sort of awesome. I mean, I could totally see myself having a bookshelf right there next to my bed and I did get a 5 on AP Lit…
11. You remember English majors have to read Shakespeare. Oh, forget that. Back to the drawing board.
