When is enough, enough? Honestly, friendships are hard and I get that, but when are you doing too much?
As a junior in college, I’ve met many people that I thought would be one of my bridesmaids one day that I now do not speak to at all. At first I couldn’t understand why, but as time went on I began to find a pattern with the people I thought were my friends. I was going and doing the above and beyond for people who couldn’t even bother to text me and make plans.
At first I thought it was just my caring side coming off too strong, but once I stopped asking those people to hang out, the friendships faded out. I’ve always been the type of person to find balance. Some of these so called friends I would even go as far as to cut out time with my boyfriend to hang out with them, only because it was a convenient time for them. I started to get really worn out and tired of nothing ever being convenient for me.
Relationships are a two-way street. You shouldn’t be the only one doing all the inviting and planning. A friend is someone you look to for support and as someone to lean on. They aren’t being a true friend if you’re looking for support, and they don’t even have the decency to answer the phone. It is a heart warming feeling when someone else asks you to do something. It’s okay even if the plans don’t work out, but it’s just nice to know someone else was thinking about spending quality time with you, and for once, you didn’t have to stress about making the plans.
At the end of the day, I needed to do things for myself and find a balanced friendship that is not solely a one-way relationship. Life is already too stressful, and the people you consider friends should not be the ones adding to that stress. They should be the ones asking, “What time should I come over for ice cream?” It’s okay for people to come and go, and friendships do not happen over night, but when you do find the type of friend who wants to spend time with you just as much as you do, hold on to them and don’t let go.
I have finally found my friends for life, and I promise, I'm never letting go.
