Ah, Thanksgiving. The holiday that revolves around everyone eating as much as humanly possible. While I personally enjoy seeing how much I can stuff myself before I explode, I also take a few moments to just appreciate everything I'm thankful for - my family, my friends, and...cuddly puppies. Therefore, I will turn it over to them to narrate your Thanksgiving.
1. First, you wake up realizing the day has arrived.
And, if you're anything like me, you're suddenly feeling the excitement that can only come with knowing that tonight you will have five helpings of mashed potatoes and no one will judge you (cue the Hallelujah chorus).
2. Now it's time to "help" Mom in the kitchen.
Or, you know, more like tasting bits of the food and getting shooed out when she realizes you're eating more than will eventually be produced for company.
3. It's a holiday, so it's important to look your best.
Thanksgiving outfits are important. They have to be cute and appropriately fall-oriented. So that prom gown is probably a bit overkill... However, Mom's lacy, long-sleeved wedding dress? Totally feasible!
Okay... maybe not.
4. Then the relatives start arriving.
And yes, if your family is as big as mine, this is usually what it looks like. A few filter in, but then there seems to be a flood of them arriving all at once! How does a person cope? Good luck to my fellow introverts!
5. There's that one cousin you haven't seen in ages that you all but attack.
Let the casual, good-natured insults ensue. Usually some wrestling fits in here as well.
6. And let's face it, every family has that one relative.
Actually, I'm probably this person in my family. Seriously, though, what are they doing over there in the corner? Muttering to themselves and generally freaking out the general populace. But as one of "those relatives," I can state that we are probably not planning on murdering anything.
7. The conversation starts, and everything is relatively civil.
Don't trust it. It's an illusion. Because the food is taking forever, and the hangry is starting to set in...
8. ...and then someone just has to bring up the election!
You voted for WHOM? There is a tense silence, and then...
9. We're off to the races! A heated debate begins!
It is not usually nearly as cute as these corgis, but sometimes it can feel like everyone is talking circles around each other. It doesn't even have to be about politics, but someone is going to go off on some buzzword like politics, religion, social issues... Mom? Is the food ready yet?
10. At last! The food is ready!
The call comes from the kitchen! It's time to eat, and everyone is practically tripping over themselves to get to the table and say grace.
11. Suddenly, everyone remembers they love each other.
The hangry is gone, and peace is restored. Food will do that, funnily enough. Although, you do wish your older cousin and her new boyfriend would maybe - ahem! - forget they love each other so much.
12. Everyone reflects on how thankful they are...
Like for the new baby in the family, or some other way God has provided, in that way He always does.
13. ...and, some years, we remember those we have lost.
But we remember that they will always be with us, as long as we hold them in our hearts.
14. After dinner, there's football...
Or sitting around, partaking in the watching of said sport.
15. ...games...
Since you just ate, it's usually not this vigorous.
16. ...but mostly just a whole bunch of people falling asleep.
I imagine they're dreaming of turkey.
17. Can't forget about Black Friday jokes
Jokes about being trampled in Black Friday sales usually follow them out the door.
18. Then the host family partakes in shenanigans.
As the youngest child, I can state that I am, in fact, the dog in the back. As soon as our guests leave, I am vulnerable. We're usually getting a second wind of energy, and I have been sat on, tackled to the couch (my siblings are fortunately nice enough to make sure I'm cushioned), and, dare I say it, pantsed. Fear for your hosts after you leave.
19. Finally, that second turkey crash sets in.
Ah, yes. You shall sleep well tonight!
Have a blessed Thanksgiving, and please don't get trampled in the Black Friday sales.
