As the holidays arrive, many people of many beliefs will be coming together to partake in the traditional turkey dinner on Thanksgiving. And in many households, this means saying a prayer to give thanks before digging into the stuffing. For most, this tradition is no big deal, but for many atheists, this presents an issue. Do you go along with the prayer against your beliefs, or do you take a stand and stick up for what you believe? As an atheist, I’m here to give you the answer: just shut up.
I recently read a letter sent in to the “Dear Prudence” advice column on Slate. The letter was sent in by a Christian wife regarding her atheist husband and his Thanksgiving performance at the previous year’s dinner. Every year, her parents hold the yearly dinner in their home. She and her family are active Christians in the Episcopalian Church (something he knew when he chose to spend his life with her). Apparently. Mr. Atheist, after years of good behavior, volunteered to say the blessing at his in-law’s Thanksgiving dinner. Instead of a blessing, his in-laws got an extended speech on “the myth of God.” Cue the horrified faces of the in-laws and a huge grin on the husband’s face. Even worse, instead of showing any remorse or second thoughts, he happily dug into his meal and has spent the last year taunting his wife with taking another atheist stance at dinner this year. Needless to say, I am horrified.
Religion and prayer is a very touchy subject, and we all have different ideas when it comes to the afterlife. However, Thanksgiving is about coming together and celebrating family and friends. It is not about shoving your beliefs or lack thereof in anyone’s face. As an atheist, I am embarrassed that this man is out there perpetuating the nasty stereotype of the angry atheist. My family is religious, and I respectfully bow my head at Thanksgiving. I do it not because I believe, but because I love and respect my family. I don’t believe this compromises who I am as a person, because who I am as a person is someone who can love and respect people who believe in different things than me.
There are so many ways to handle a difference in beliefs, and mouthing off is not one of them. The only thing this man proved was how big of an ungrateful pig he is, and I hope his wife questions the type of man she is spending her life with. So, if you find yourself in this type of situation, please don’t handle it by embarrassing yourself and slighting the people that just put hours into making a meal to feed you. If saying a prayer is too much for you, that is perfectly fine. Politely excuse yourself to the bathroom or get a drink and return when the prayer is over. Or you can treat it as if you are visiting a new country and culture and just politely observe.
Our generation gets so much flack about lacking respect, and this is the perfect opportunity to prove everyone wrong. So let’s stay classy, everyone, and avoid becoming the loner who eats a Lean Cuisine on Thanksgiving.
