The Lack Of Manners In Today's Society

The Lack Of Manners In Today's Society

Didn't your parents teach you right?
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Recently, I have been blinded by the sheer lack of manners of people in today's society. All around me, I am surrounded by rude people with no regard for the safety, concern or respect of the people who are around them and it makes me question their upbringing. Sadly, this world has become a very dark place to live in, and I feel like you cannot trust anyone. The more I look around at this world, I feel like people only have one thing they want to look out for: themselves.

I want to remind people of some pretty basic manners. I feel like civilization has forgotten and in return has created a downfall. Without manners and love for one another, this world will get darker and darker. Here are a list of some of the most forgotten manners that need to be reintroduced into today's society for better community living.

Saying "Please" and "Thank you."

I feel like this was the very first set of manners I was taught when I was a child and yet, this is the most unused set of manners today! I walk around the cafeteria at my college and hear fellow students demand something without a please or a thank you. To be honest, it makes me want to smack them upside the head! Did your parents forget to teach you the core basics of respect? It might be that person's "job" to retrieve you whatever it was you asked for; however, it is not their job to do it in any time fashion. You could ask for a side of ranch and they could take 15 minutes -- however, you ask for a side of ranch please, that waiter/waitress might bring that ranch a lot faster.

Saying please and thank you takes an extra two breaths and is more respectful. That person you are showing respect to is a human just as you are, and therefore, they deserve manners just like you do.

Holding the door open for others.

My parents taught me that you are to hold the door for anyone -- it does not matter who they are: black, white, purple, green, male, female, young, old, baby, someone you love or someone you hate. You show respect to someone no matter what and you hold the door open. Period.

Today, I find it rare that the door is held open for me. I am a female. I do like the ideals of some of the modern feminist ideas -- however, this is not one of them. If you see me coming, hold the door open for me. I do not care if you are a male or a female, hold the door. I know I have arms, but so do you -- it's called respect.

Saying, "Excuse me."

Life is a beginning and an end with a lot of hustle and bustle in the middle. I get it, life is crazy during the in between, and people are typically running around like crazy dogs running away from a dog catcher. What I do not understand is why we as a society have lost the art of using the words "excuse me" when trying to get around someone or when we bump into someone. Since when did it become okay to run into someone and act like almost taking off that poor innocent person's arm did not matter to you? Oh yeah -- it never has.

Telling someone, "Bless you."

According to gotquestions.org, saying "bless you" to someone has many different backgrounds. The most thought of origin came from illness. In 590 AD, Italy suffered a horrible plague and the Pope issued a law that stated that whenever someone sneezed, people were to say "God bless you" and make the cross over their mouths, in hopes to keep the person from catching the plague.

Because a sneeze was a symptom of the plague, people who heard another sneeze and said "God bless you" took interest in the person's life. So today, when someone sneezes, and someone says "bless you," they are taking an interest as well. They want the person to know that they wish them well. While this seems like a minor act, it is an act that can go a long way for someone.

Using eye contact.

Maybe it is just me, but something that can really irritate me faster than being cut off in traffic is when someone does not make eye contact with me while having a conversation. Eye contact is key to any good conversation. It allows the person you are communicating with to know that you are interested in what they have to say and that you value their time. Therefore, when you have a conversation with someone, look them in the eyes and let them know you value their time and what they have to say.

Waiting your turn.

Like I said before, I know life is busy. There is just one thing I want to clarify with everyone. Your life is busy, but so is everyone else's. I have things within my life that I have to do that require urgency and I know you do as well. Life is about waiting though. Patience is a virtue, or so they say. You wait to go to school. You wait to graduate. You wait to get married and have kids. You wait to retire. Wait. It is within the waiting that you find that life is actually happening and your life is worthwhile.

Using someone's PROPER title.

The use of someone's proper title is so important in today's society, especially if someone has their PhD. I cannot tell you the lectures I have heard professors tell their students about the amount of hours they put in for their degrees and how they are important to them.

And this concept goes beyond the PhD title. If someone is married or divorced, those titles matter as well. Calling someone a Ms. when they are are truly a Mrs. can make someone upset. Make sure you know someone's title before you address them.

Basic respect for one another.

I don't know if it's just me, or if it has always been like this, but I feel like the level of rudeness that people have toward one another has escalated from a level one to threat level. Since when did it become okay for everyone to talk about each other? Since when did it become okay for others to use one another to climb their way to the top of the social ladder? When did the basic instinct of human compassion leave each of our hearts and we all become so selfish. I know, you might think that these are not manners, but they are. The definition of manners is the way a person acts toward one another. So when did our ideal standards of manners become ignorance?

Ladies first.

I stated earlier that I agree on some of the ideas of the feminist movement. However, for the most part, I am a true believer of the old fashioned ways. I believe in a man paying for the first few dates (and then lady, you better ask if you can pay!). I believe that a man should come to the door when he picks up a lady. I believe that a man should hold the door open for a female and open her car door. Ladies, by allowing a man to do this, it does not make you weak, it makes them more chivalrous -- it makes you a lady.

I think that with the rise of the feminist movements (and don't get me wrong, I want equal pay and other equal rights as men), I think women have lost their ability to allow a man to pamper them and to be spoiled to a degree. Today, a woman thinks she is weak if a man gets the door for them. You aren't. Let him get that door for you. This is not a sign of your weakness but a sign of his respect.

Modest is hottest.

I have four words for the women of today: put your clothes on. I am deeply saddened when I walk out the door and I notice women with their chests exposed and with their bottoms hanging out. I joke with my best friend that if the woman sneezes too hard, she will lose her bottom right out of her shorts -- and the sad thing is that the statement is the truth. Ladies, I want to tell you the honest truth. If a man is going to love you, he will love and respect you for the woman you are, not the way you dress. You shouldn't be dressing like a woman of the night trying to make a quick dollar when you are going to church to praise the Lord. That is not the kind of woman you want to be, or the kind or woman you want your future daughter to be.

Men, if you see women like this, do not engage. If a woman is dressing like this, she is damaged and is in serious need of help. She doesn't respect herself or you if she is dressing like that.

Respect yourself. Respect others, and dress to impress.

Proper sidewalk etiquette.

Back in the "olden days," it was proper for a man to escort a female wherever they went for her safety. It was also custom for a male to walk on the outside of the road and have the female toward the buildings. This kept the females safe from flying fecal matter from buildings above, or sewage from the road that could splash the lady's dress.

Today, I think that concept still applies. I think that men should be escorting a female wherever they can if possible. The world we live in is full of hate and sorrow, murder and despair, and there is death all around us. Be safe and take precautions when walking with someone you care about. Traditions may seem old -- however, they can always be revamped to fit modern day ideals.

Proper table manners.

If you don't know proper table manners by now, I have to wonder about your upbringing. Are you actually a caveman? I am going to make this short and sweet because these are things that cannot be debated on.

No chewing with your mouth open. Keep your elbows off the table. Do not reach in front of others' plates. Don't talk with your mouth full. Ask to be excused from the table. Keep all "natural gases" and slurps inside your body at all times.

If you have questions about these table manners, feel free to ask your grandparents. I guarantee they will teach you some manners, because mine sure did.

While there are thousands of manners we could be discussing, I feel these are the most important in today's society. Without manners and respect, this world has nothing. We must all learn the art of respect toward one another again to live in harmony once again.

Cover Image Credit: pathways.org

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All the things I should thank you for more often than I do.
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To My Best Friend,

This thank you is long overdue. There are so many things I want to thank you for, and I’m sure I’m going to still be missing some by the end of this letter. But here is a small token of my gratitude for just being by my side in this life and making it all worthwhile.

Thank you first of all for accepting me and loving me for exactly who I am. This isn’t easy. I can be stubborn, difficult and confusing, but you love and accept me for me. There are days I wonder when you’ll finally come to your senses and move on and find a new BFF, one who isn’t so complicated, but to my amazement, you never do. You tell me you’ll take the good with the bad, and when I question whether I have any good left, you’re always there to reassure me and show me that I do. Thank you for loving me in my dorky and difficult moments, moments where if the rest of the world saw them, they’d probably walk away. Thank you for understanding me like no one else does; if we didn’t have the connection we did, I can’t imagine how lonely and big this world would feel. Because of you, this world seems like a little friendlier place, one I can see myself being a part of.

Thank you for being my biggest fan. Besides my family, you are my biggest supporter, and I know that when I win, you win, and when you win, I win. In this battle we call life, it doesn’t matter who’s in my opponents corner, because I know I am always going to have you in mine, and that’s the best asset I could ever ask for. You encourage me to chase my dreams like no one else does, and I can tell that you sincerely hurt when I hurt — not many people care about me in such a deep way. Whatever crazy dream I tell you I’m going to chase after next, you believe I can do it, even when the rest of the world thinks I’m crazy for even suggesting it. When something good happens, you’re the first person I want to tell, and when something bad happens, you’re the first one I go to for support.

Thank you for being you. You are incredible my dear, and I can’t wait to constantly remind your husband that he got crazy lucky and out kicked his coverage big time. You are beautiful inside and out. On the outside, you are so gorgeous; you’re very own unique and incredible definition of beauty, and I know I’m one of many who see it. You’re intimidating to stand next to in pictures because I know your light shines so bright, but I’ll gladly stand next to you and take a picture, because I’m so excited to show the world how breathtakingly beautiful my best friend is. On the inside you are even prettier, with a warm heart, a sharp mind and an unbelievable personality. You are hands down the funniest person I know, and I still can’t believe that someone as funny and hilarious as you chooses to spend her time with someone as dweeby and awkward as me. I mean, half the time we’re laughing at some fail I had or something stupid I did, so I guess I contribute a little bit to our constant laughing. You are so kind and so sweet, and have the biggest heart of anyone I know. God spent a little extra time when he made you, because you’re the total package: you’re beautiful, awesome and amazing, all wrapped in one, and I’m so lucky he put you in my life—he knows I’d be lost without you.

Thank you for being there for me whenever I need it. It was once said that “all that relationships are are being there for someone when they need you,” and you’re a pro at this. Whether it be because another boy is being stupid or I’m feeling alone, I know all I need to do is call you, and I’ll instantly feel better. You help my through the countless problems Lord knows I have trouble solving, and you reassure me that no matter what, you’re always going to be there for me. This is huge, and something very few people have been able to do for me, but you always have, and I know you always will be. And that is the most reassuring thing I know, knowing that if all hell breaks loose, the world falls apart and I have no one, I’ll have you. And that is all I need.

Thank you for being a spark, a light in my life that no matter how dark the world around us gets, is always there to light my way and show me the way home. Thank you for laughing with me when God blesses us with a funny moment, and crying with me when God is trying to tell me something. Thank you for standing beside me in the greatest of moments and the darkest of hours. Thank you for being the one I share my fondest memories with: all the nights we stayed up really late, all the exciting adventures we went on and all the inside jokes we still laugh about today. Thank you for growing up with me; for being there every step of the way and creating some of my happiest moments with me. Thank you for all the memories I've shared with you, and I can't wait for what crazy adventure we're going to go on next.

So thank you for accepting me, loving me, and supporting me. Thank you for being your wonderful self, and thank you for being there for me, through thick and thin, even when I'm at my lowest. Thank you for shining your brilliant light into my life and illuminating my world.

Oh, and thank you for being my maid of honor. I know I won’t need to ask you for a while, but you had to know it was coming, right?

Thank you for being the godmother to my future children, the sister to my family, and another daughter to my parents.

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Cover Image Credit: EnkiVillage

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Teens Started A #IfIDieInASchoolShooting Trend On Twitter, Because This Is The World We Live In Now

Because the truth is, school shootings have become so prevalent in America that children of all ages see them as inevitable.
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Last Friday, a gunman killed ten people in a high school in Santa Fe, Texas. So far in the 20 weeks of 2018, there have been 22 school shootings in America, which averages to about one school shooting per week.

With social awareness involving gun violence increasing since the Parkland shooting in February, the narrative has shifted to include vocal and active teens who have pressed lawmakers for forms of gun control. These teens have organized marches around the country and called out politicians who have ties with the NRA.

Because the truth is that school shootings have become so prevalent in American society that children of all ages see them as inevitable.

After Friday's shooting American teens took to Twitter to talk about the inaction of lawmakers and the cycle of violence that threatens their lives everyday.

The hashtag #IfIDieInASchoolShooting voices the final wishes, fears, and unachieved dreams of teenagers if their lives were to be shot down in a classroom.

Many wanted their deaths to push the conversation for gun control forward:

Others were aware of how their future would be cut short:

Or that, in the end, their lives would make little impact to prevent future tragedies:

And teens who have already been affected by gun violence remember those they lost:

There was a heartbreaking moment during the aftermath of Friday's shooting in which a student was asked if she thought something as momentous as this would ever happen at her school.

Her eyes downcast and her voice shaking with shock, she let out a small sound of exasperation. "No," she said. "It's been happening everywhere. I always kind of felt like eventually it was going to happen here too."

We are no longer surprised.

School shootings are regular fixtures in our news feeds. We comment on the tragedy and look on as politicians make excuses and fix nothing.

The fact that children in America know that they might be murdered in their classrooms is inexcusable. No child should ever have to fear for their life or plan their eulogy. Change is desperately needed, and we can no longer afford to forget.

Cover Image Credit: Twitter

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