“Your cute.”
I scoffed as the message appeared in my notifications. “It’s *you’re, idiot,” was my first thought. I waited approximately two and a half hours to reply to the text, as to not falsely inflate his ego and make him think he was even close to being my top priority. “Thanks,” was my long-awaited reply.
I’m not entirely sure why I’m like this, but I’ve always thought of men’s compliments as being childish, cliche and often grammatically incorrect. I am usually tempted to reply with “I know,” or something else equally as conceited. I don’t consider myself a selfish person, but when it comes to accepting compliments from guys, I feel myself transform into nothing short of a narcissistic bitch.
Perhaps it’s all the your instead of you’re or the winky faces that accompany them, but I simply cannot take these compliments seriously. 19-year-old boys want a lot of things from girls, and a sincere thank you is not one of them. I’ve found that these “compliments,” contain many layers.
The kinder the compliment, the more desperate the guy. “Your cute”= We should keep texting. “Your the most beautiful girl I’ve evr seen and u deserve the world” = You better hook up with me after I send this or it will be for nothing.
I know I’m being cold, but I’ve become extremely wary around men, especially the so-called “nice guys.” I don’t think it’s wrong for me to laugh when I’m told that “I’m not like other girls,” after 10 minutes of texting.
Compliments mean something to me, as they should to everyone. I resent the fact that men often have ulterior motives when they call us pretty. When someone compliments me, I would like it to come from the heart. Perhaps I should be naive and take every kissing face emoji I am sent with giddiness, but all I see are lies. I feel as if I am an intricate part of a board game every boy is playing.
Next time you’re about to compliment a girl, or anyone for that matter, make sure you truly mean it. Allow yourself to be introspective for a moment and reflect on the person you’re talking to. On a slightly unrelated note, there is so much more to girls than looks. We are so quick to praise looks in our society, and in doing so, we neglect everything else we have to offer. Compliment a girl’s mind, compliment her interests, her goals, her successes. Remind her that she is so much more than a face and a body.
The other day, a friend told that she felt the only thing she had to offer was her body, that it was the only thing guys cared about. I do not want to live in a society where a women feels that her mind is unnoticed. We have so much more to offer than looks, and realizing that can start with a simple compliment. Do not be so quick to shower a girl with praise. Discover her first. Learn her quirks and hobbies and fears. Find a way to tell her she is beautiful in her mind, and stunning in her soul.
