To the ones who loved me when life felt impossible, thank you for your unstoppable pursuit, your unending love, your undeniable patience, your encouragement that extends from the east to the west and your ability to show me light when all I could see was darkness.

There is no denying that this past year was a year that felt as though it would never end. A year that was filled with suffering, sorrow and darkness in my heart and in my mind. I felt a darkness and an uneasiness that I had never felt before, and I have finally started to open up about the anxiety and depression that managed to creep into every bit of my happiness and cripple me in a way that I would have rather died than experience another second in this life. Whenever I started opening up to people, they would lift me up by telling me that I am so strong, or that they are so proud of me for getting through it all. As encouraging as this is, the ones who really deserve a lot of credit are the ones who stood by me and refused to let me drown when I felt like I couldn’t breathe. I couldn’t have done it without them, and they know who they are.

So, thank you my loves. Thank you for never giving up on me and telling me about the love, grace and sovereignty of God when I couldn’t feel it anymore. Thank you for loving me when I was really hard to love. Thank you for never leaving my side even though it would drag you down to be around me. Thank you for seeing through the face that I put on for everyone else. Thank you for showing me that I don’t have to hide from you because no matter how bad it gets, you aren’t going anywhere. Thank you for never stopping to tell me how my worth and my purpose within Christ, even though I would roll my eyes every time you told me. Thank you for literally dragging me out of my bed when I hadn’t moved all day. Thank you for putting up with my harsh words and my terrible attitude when you were just trying to help. Thank you for holding me while I cried and not letting go. Thank you for constantly pushing me when that was the last thing I wanted, because ultimately it got me through. Thank you for making me laugh until I cried when I felt like my tears had been used up by sorrow. Finally, thank you for being the light of Christ through all of it and for never giving up on me.

I think I finally understand why we are called to be in community. It is exactly this. Because who wants to go through life alone? I am truly blessed to be surrounded by people who never fail to be the broken creation that they are yet, they are so good at being my friends, rather, my family. So again, thank you for being you, and thank you for loving me when I was at my worst. I wouldn’t be where I am today if it wasn’t for you.