I am so thankful for you. I am so incredibly grateful that you are in my life; words will never be able to explain. I know I don't say this enough, but I really do appreciate you. I appreciate you and need you more than you think, more than I let you believe. For years I have let you blame my "bad friendship skills" on my personality. You have accepted it as "just who I am", and this is why you are the very few still sticking by me. I know that being my friend is hard, constantly being there for me, and feeling like it is not being reciprocated. I know you feel unappreciated by me, and I know that you get mad at me, but through it all, somehow, you are still here, and it means the world to me.
So, thank you for being there, thank you for being here, thank you for sticking by me no matter how little I am able to stick by you sometimes. Nothing is as precious as time, and you have chosen to gift me with yours over and over again. You've chosen me over and over again.
Through it all, thank you for being real. There is nothing that I value more in today's world than "realness". You are the most real people I know. Thank you for calling me out on my flaws so that I am able to work on them even though I ALWAYS get mad at you when you do, thank you for making me mad, and happy, for challenging me, and making me feel even on days when I have refused to.
Thank you for understanding me, or constantly just choosing to try to. I know I am a complicated little person, and I know it is hard to keep up with my moods and my annoying personality. Sorry I constantly get annoyed at you because I am unable to understand your humor. I am sorry that sometimes I can be blind to how deep your issues go and be the opposite of helpful. I am sorry that I make you feel like you shouldn't "burden" me with your problems. I'm sorry it literally feels like a job to be my friend most often than not.
I know that sometimes I may act like I want to change you, but I don't. I mean yes, you can be a bit intense at times, but in the end, you are my best friend and I love you and appreciate you the way you are, don't ever change.
But most of all I just want to thank you for never leaving, no matter how much it seems like I am trying to push you away, or how much it seems like I don't care about you. This is not an excuse and will never be an excuse, but I just live in this constant fear that someday you will, and I just don't know what I would do without you.
Thank you for always coming back to me, and always choosing me. Know that you keep me living, you give me a reason and a purpose, and you have given me the love that a broken, complicated person like me needs to get through the day. Thank you for constantly giving even though you don't always get much back. I love you.
