This week I experienced a loss that I never thought would hurt as much as it did. It was as if I'd lost a family member, a best friend and a companion all in one. It was the loss of my childhood dog. He was a happy golden retriever that was always panting and wagging his tail. His name was Reno. Since the age of 8, my dog has been a part of my life. In fact, I don’t have too many memories without him. And instead of letting myself spin into a cycle of grief, I instead have tried to reflect on his life and all the positivity he brought to it.

Thank you, Reno, for always being someone to play with. From the minute dogs are born, they are filled with energy. Always ready to play fetch, go on a walk or just wrestle a little bit. Reno always wanted to join in on the dance parties I had with my mom. Throughout my life, I always had a play buddy for any moment of boredom.

Thank you for being a shoulder to cry on. Dogs have this great intuition where they can sense when humans are upset, and Reno was no different. Dogs are able to give you the silence you at some points need but also the companionship and love. They are always willing to cuddle up to you and give you kisses. They run up to you smiling and wagging just urging to change your mood. And often times, it works.

Thank you for being listening ears and never talking back. Dogs are the best listeners. You are able to let everything out and express to them your deepest feelings, knowing they won’t be telling anyone. They sit silently and listen, and give you love when you’re done. Sometimes people tell you things you don’t want to hear, but dogs don’t say anything at all.

Thank you for always being excited to see me, and also, sad to see me go. No one could make me feel more appreciated than you did. Nothing feels better than someone running to greet you every time you get home. Or waking up to find your dog lying outside your door, waiting for you. Whenever my family would pack up for trips, Reno would get so sad. It was nice to know someone was missing me and looking forward to seeing me.

Most importantly, thank you for loving me unconditionally. You never cared if I had makeup on, what my outfit looked like, or if I had stupid comments. Over the past week I have regretted all the times I got angry with Reno. Whether it be his just following me around or lying where I needed to walk, I found it easy to yell at him. And even when I yelled at him, he would never stop loving me. He loved me on my sad days when I needed support and he loved me on my good days in support of my happiness.

Dogs truly bring something into your life unlike any relationship you will ever experience. I grew up with my dog. He was with me in my naïve elementary school days, my nerdy pre-teen days, my insecure high school days and finally sent me off to college. He might not be with me anymore, but he will always be with me in my heart. I love you Reno.