We have all been in that one relationship that we thought was the best thing that could ever happen to us (in the moment). For me, I thought that this relationship was it. As naive as it sounds, I was convinced that he was "the one." I thought that I would never find anything better than what I had. But when this relationship came to an abrupt and bitter end, I found myself left with nothing but a hole in my heart. Coming back from the heartbreak that I thought would kill me was not an easy journey, but I learned so much on the way. Here are some of the things that I came to realize about love that I wouldn't have been able to discover without being in an unhealthy relationship.
Dear you,
Thank you for controlling me. Because of you I realized that a significant other who does that to you, is not a good one. Because of you I will never allow a man to decide my fate. Now I know that my freedom is sacred, and I should be able to do the things that make me happy. I should be able to go out to the city with my girl friends, without having to worry about what you might say.
Thank you for buying me things after a terrible fight. Because of you I realized that a significant other should be buying me flowers, but not because they are trying to say "I'm sorry."
Thank you for drooling over other girls in front of me, causing me to have constant anxiety when we are apart. Because of you, I realize that I can't be in a relationship with someone that I can't trust. I should know how much I mean to him, without having to guess and worry.
Thank you for calling me names. Because of you I realized that feeling badly about myself is unhealthy. Because of you, I will never allow a man to call me a bitch or slut again. Being put down by someone you're with is unacceptable, and I know that now.
Thanks to you, I realized that the most important thing about love is loving myself. I never believed the quote about loving yourself before loving somebody else until you treated me like crap. But since we broke up, I have fallen in love with taking care of myself –– mind, body and soul. I realized that it's OK to get a manicure or to get my hair done because it's something that makes me happy. Because of the way you treated me, I have come to meet a version of myself that I didn't know existed. I didn't know how unhappy I was until now, because I have finally discovered true happiness. When we first broke up I believed that our relationship was a waste of my time, but because of you I have so much to thank you for.Sincerely,
A much happier me
