Let me start with this: I love my parents to no end and they've always done everything they could not only for my well-being but, for my happiness as well.
Ever since I started being able to think on my own and form my own opinions on the things that the world throws at everyone and the people the world lets me meet, I started butting heads with my parents. The world and the places that they grew up are completely and utterly different than what I have been exposed to. And, that's completely fine. There is no shame in that or any aspect of their childhood. However, it seems that they cannot completely grasp the concept of their little girl making her own little way through this not-so-little world.
So, here's some things that I have realized that I really do wish I could convey better to my parents:
1.) The world is SO BIG and there are SO MANY people experiencing each day in SO MANY different ways, and you can learn SO MUCH from all of those people.
No two people have the exact same outlook on life. You have to keep your mind open to all those different ideas of how it works because there are endless ways to look at it all.
2.) Sometimes, I do know what is best for me.
Yes, they've been here, done that, got the t-shirt but they weren't, aren't, and never will be me. I react differently than they would have in every situation. Maybe they do know what's best for physical health and making it through with food in my stomach and a roof over my head, but, I know what will keep me happy to a certain degree. Am I feeling stressed? I need to go for a walk, or a drive, or ride my board a bit. Am I feeling overwhelmed? Music is where it's at. I know my mind and, though I may not understand it completely, I know what helps it calm down.
3.) Literature and music put into words how I feel much better than I ever could.
I connect so much with other people, especially when their thoughts are conveyed in literature or music. I read so many things and my mind is just blown with how well they phrase that thought. I tend to think, "OH MY GOD THAT'S WHAT I FEEL!" I tried telling my parents how they make me feel sometimes, and I used a poem I recently read in my English class. They instantly shut me down when I tried to explain to them what I thought that author meant by the words he had written. I understand that literature and music aren't as important to them as it is to me, but I wish they'd listen a bit more and understand the deeper meaning.
4.) I'm only half kidding when I make self-deprecating jokes.
Yes, okay, I am absolute Tumblr trash, but, that's okay. I have seen first hand what making light of a gloomy situation can do to actually lighten the entire thing up. So, I pick on my own insecurities to help deal with the fact that I do actually feel like trash. My parents have all the reason in the world to worry when those jokes start getting more and more frequent and slightly more dark. But, they need to understand that, yes, I am gonna be okay. This is just how I connect with 98% of my friends. You don't need to give me a pep talk everytime I make a joke. (Though, on the darker ones, it is sometimes appreciated.)
5.) I don't understand new technology any better than they do.
At first, it's all confusing. Even getting a slightly newer model phone confuses me. I'm just more willing to work with it and figure it out piece by frustrating piece. If they sat down and just messed around on their computer or their phones, they could easily surpass me with the understanding of that. (I tend to just find out what I absolutely need to know and continue on. I occasionally do find something that's pretty neat.) Please, stop asking me how to work your computer. I don't know.
6.) No, I'm not going to buy jeans that have holes in them.
But, I will make those holes myself. When my parents were young (I just got this lecture yesterday), holes in their clothes were looked down upon. It showed the other kids that they were "too poor" to buy new clothes. Don't ask me why holey jeans came to the status they are at now, and don't ask me what their appeal is. I don't know that either.
7.) When I'm trying to learn a new song on my guitar (or ukulele) don't ask me questions.
This may seem like a bratty thing to say, but, it's true. If you ask me a question, especially if I just got in the rhythm of that song, you are going to get a salty answer. I just get so focused and put all my brain power behind trying to figure a song out that, when I have to use my mind to answer a question that could have waited two minutes, it upsets me. I wanna focus on it. Please, please let me focus.
8.) When I'm on my phone, I'm usually looking at memes.
No, I'm not always talking to my grand total of three friends. No, I'm not smiling at a sweet message. I'm smiling at doggo memes that come on my Facebook or Tumblr. I'm laughing at the Kermit memes about overreacting because we all know I do that too much. But, even then, it's also a "there's really nothing to do" and/or "this topic f conversation is making me feel uncomfortable but doggos make it better" thing. I'm not always socializing and I'm not ignoring you. I hear what you're saying just as well when I'm looking at my phone versus watching the movie.
9.) When I say "I understand", most the time I mean that I got the concept regardless of if I've been through it.
My dad is especially notorious for not getting this. He'll tell me such and such happened and, because of that, I have to do such and such. I always reply with "Understood". And, to that, he usually says something along the lines of, "No, you don't. You haven't been through it." There's a big, shining difference between sympathizing and empathizing, Pops.
10.) No matter what, I love them and I'm glad they're on my team.
No matter what I do, both of my parents have always told me they're proud of me. No matter what hairstyle or color, or clothing style, or piercing, or music choice for the week, they have always supported me fully. We butt heads more often than what would be ideal but, they have always, always, ALWAYS been here for me. If I asked them to stand on the sidelines, they would stand there with Band-Aids and Neosporin on the ready in the occasion that I fell.
