1. Getting up on the wrong side of the bed.
The rest of your day is pretty much prophesied by whether or not this happens.
2.You get up in the morning and either feels inherently hot or like garbage all day.
No mirror, lighting, measure of sweatpants, hair gel or makeup can change how good or bad you look today. It’s either one or the other. Sorry.
3. You either finish a cup of coffee in 20 minutes or 20 hours.
When does it start being inappropriate to start microwaving this morning’s Starbucks?
4. That weird thing where it’s really hot in the morning, and then frigid by nightfall.
Or when it’s freezing at dawn, and blustering hot by sunset.
What the hell am I supposed to wear when that happens? MAKE UP YOUR MIND, MOTHER NATURE.
5.You can memorize a song after hearing it on the radio 3 times, but you can't memorize the material that’s going to be on your final exams.
Maybe if vocab definitions and scientific formulas were sung to the beat of “Beez in the Trap”, we’d all have a 4.0.
6. It’s either you sit for 7 hours straight to read the new book you got, or it takes you 7 months.
At this rate, I’m never finishing The Martian before it leaves theaters…
7. In short, motivation on the weekends is an all or nothing situation.
It’s getting up at 9 am and working until you pass out, or being passed out in bed all day.
8. Skorts
It’s like a mullet for your butt: business in the front, party in the back. Or maybe the party is in the front because the front part is a skirt? No idea…
Are they in style again? Are they still out of style? Are they even appropriate to wear as an adult?
9. Crocs
You either love them,or you hate them with the red hot intensity of a thousands suns.
10. Dogs
If you hate dogs, you really need to re-evaluate your life choices. If every person on earth was a dog instead of a person, I would be perfectly fine with that.