No matter how long or how glorious your contribution to the sport, wrestling is always a part of your life, even after you step off the mat for good. Your wrestling shoes are still shoved in the back of your closet because you can’t bear to throw them out and your gross singlet has been trashed, but you can’t stop thinking about the only sport in the world that matters.
There are ten things that apply to all former wrestlers:
10. You always have a bit of a superiority complex when it comes to other sports.
It’s not our fault we cut our teeth doing the most demanding sport in the world. You play football? That’s cute.
9. You’re a monster when it comes to buffets.
Unlimited breadsticks when I don’t have to cut weight ever again? Only the entire Penn State wrestling team can stop me now.
8. You have a crazy cutting weight story.
Whether it’s your teammate who cut 10 pounds in a week and almost passed out or your younger brother’s babysitter’s cousin’s teammate who took a laxative and then pooped himself during a match, everyone’s either done or knows someone who’s done something crazy to shed those last two pounds. Wrestlers laugh at those stories.
When you tell your non-wrestling friends, they think you’re crazy.
7. You still haven’t emotionally recovered from the time the Olympics tried to cut wrestling.
If you’re going to cut the oldest sport in the world, why even have the Olympic games?
6. You’re terrible about admitting when you’re hurt.
It only hurts when I put weight on it. Or sit. Or lie down. But I’m fine and totally don’t need to see a doctor.
5. You think wrestling is the most underrated, under-watched sport on the planet.
If there was any justice in the world, Jordan Burroughs would be just as much a household name as Steph Curry or Lionel Messi.
4. If there’s one good thing that came out of not being able to wrestle anymore, it’s never having to wear a singlet again.
Not only is it the most unflattering article of clothing known to man (or woman), singlet wedgies are THE WORST. Putting it on and taking it off took at least 15 minutes, which was even more fun if your team wore reversible ones to tournaments.
3. You miss the times when your bruises had cool stories behind them.
“I got this while wrestling” sounds way cooler than “I bumped into my desk when I woke up.”
2. There’s still one match (or two... or 20) you would give anything to go back and redo.
If only I had listened to my coach all those times he yelled at me to take a shot, I wouldn’t have to hide my record with embarrassment.
1. You know wrestlers have the best community.
No matter how you were involved with the sport, whether you wrestled for two years or 10, whether you were a wrestling manager or mom, wrestlers worldwide form a tight-knit community. All you have to do is mention wrestling to someone and they will excitedly start trading their best wrestling stories with you.
I’ve met some really cool people at college by commenting on the wrestling gear they wore, and when I wore my old warm-up jacket on a plane, an old man who was a former wrestler actually hugged me. I probably will never wrestle again, but I’m grateful for the years I was able to spend with the sport.
