If Anybody Tells Me "Happy Holidays," I Will Punch Them in the Face | The Odyssey Online
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Politics and Activism

If Anybody Tells Me "Happy Holidays," I Will Punch Them in the Face

Dear America, It is time to take Christmas Back!

Kyle Quinn
Dec 07, 2015
Bard College
26
If Anybody Tells Me "Happy Holidays," I Will Punch Them in the Face
soclday.com

Despite what the liberal media might try to have you believe, there is a war on Christmas. I have experienced it first hand. Walking through the malls, I see a lack of Nativity scenes as well as a lack of Santa Claus’ that children can take pictures with and read their lists of desired gifts. Instead, in an attempt to “include” and not “offend” anyone, stores have replaced the greatest phrase of all time, “Merry Christmas,” with “Happy Holidays.” I’m sick of the media trying to kill Christmas, and I will say “Merry Christmas” to whomever I please. That’s why if anybody says “Happy Holidays” to me this season, I will punch them in the face.

I have a surprising statistic which may offend some of you, so cover your eyes if you’re too “sensitive:” 71% of Americans still identify as Christians! While that may be down from 78% in 2007, it clearly shows that Christians are still ruling America. This country does not need to appeal to any Muslims or Jews because what do they matter to the majority of Christians? I carry this statistic with pride, and if anybody attempts to correct me when I use “Merry Christmas,” I tell them that America is still by and large a Christian nation, so if you’re not a fan of Jesus, you might as well leave. While you’re here, you will praise and pray to Jesus because he died for all of us! Who are you to put down His great gift? We are all saved, and if you want to be condemned to hell, that is fine with me, but I will not allow you to destroy the holiday which savors His birth.

I guarantee I will punch you in the face if I hear you say “Happy Holidays” anywhere. I’m talking to all of you: I have no problem sacrificing my hand so that I can cherish Christmas without any of you attempting to force your holiday traditions on me. Muslims? Nope. Jews? Get outta here! Christians have more of a right to celebrate than you do because we founded this country, and we sure as hell still do! Just look again at the statistic above. Either celebrate Christmas or shut up.

I know you want to test me.

Do it.

I dare you.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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