How many times in your life have you heard someone say “when you’re older you’ll understand?" I’ve lost track of how many times I’ve felt like I’m not taken seriously because I’m a teenager. It’s like I’m too old to be considered a kid, but at the same time I’m too young to be considered independent from my parents. It has come to my attention that there’s a gap in the amount of focus that’s being distributed in society. More specifically, I’ve noticed that too many teens are falling through the cracks because society just assumes that we’re old enough to handle our own problems. “You’ll be off on your own soon. You should know how to handle these things” or “You need to start learning how to deal with these things by yourself. We can’t hold your hand your whole life.” But then when we do try to handle these things on our own and we mess up, we’re treated like a child. “You’re only seventeen, and you think you can do whatever you want? Well you’re wrong” and “You need to be more responsible. You had no idea what could’ve happened.”

Teens are such an important and fragile part of society. We are all stumbling through life trying to gain an identity that suits us while trying to prepare ourselves for the looming adulthood that lies ahead. We’re trying to finish up homework assignments, save up for a car, and figure out what to major in. Simultaneously we’re also trying to balance a social life and manage to get at least a few hours of sleep every night. We want to spend time with our friends and we’re trying to please our families, and in the midst of all this chaos, we forget about ourselves.

A lot of times, teens do not get enough credit for the amount of pressure that is put on us to figure out our lives by ourselves. Now don’t get me wrong, lots of families, mine included, are incredibly supportive, and do the best they can to help prepare their son or daughter for the future. I know I’m very fortunate to have such a supportive family, but I also know that some teens/young adults don’t have this luxury. I have several friends that feel like they’re on their own because of the lack of a support system. With that being said, why is society still putting all this pressure on teens to get their lives together while also overlooking them when they begin to struggle? Being a teenager comes with wanting some independence and wanting to be viewed as an individual capable of making decisions. Being a teenager does NOT mean that we want to be drop-kicked out of the nest and then get scolded for not knowing what we’re doing. There is a huge difference between independence and abandonment.

I think we can all agree that adolescence is/was a difficult time in our lives when it comes to self-esteem and finding an identity. This is the time in a teen’s life when they need the most help. As a teen, it’s frustrating when everyone’s attention goes to kids or adults because everyone assumes teens are fine by themselves and don’t need guidance, which is beyond wrong.

If you take anything away from reading this article it’s this: please do not assume that teenagers have their lives figured out or that they are in any less need of attention than an adult or young child. Next time you see a teen/young adult struggling, take some time to talk to them. You might be surprised how a small gesture of attention could change their lives.