We all have our idols; people we may or may not know personally who we look up to for one reason or another. The one person I can attribute this title to is actor and singer Darren Criss, known best for his roles as Blaine Anderson on FOX’s hit musical drama comedy Glee, and as the title character in his college theatre troupe StarKid’s original Harry Potter parodies: A Very Potter Musical (AVPM), A Very Potter Sequel (AVPS), and A Very Potter Senior Year (AVPSY).
Darren Everett Criss was born February 5, 1987 in San Francisco, California. He is the younger of two sons. Darren is known throughout the Glee fandom for being on the short side, only standing at about 5’6.5’’. He has ultra-curly dark brown hair, so rich it’s almost black, and the most mesmerizing hazel eyes.
Darren grew up fully immersed in the music and theatre scene of his hometown, becoming classically trained in violin at the age of five. Since then, Darren has taught himself multiple other instruments including guitar, piano, mandolin, harmonica and drums, and he sings. My introduction to Darren’s talents was late in the summer of 2009, the year that AVPM was posted on YouTube. I have always been a big fan of both the Harry Potter series and musical theater, so you can imagine my surprise and excitement when I discovered that two of my greatest loves had been combined. I watched the musical in absolute awe, quickly becoming obsessed with this group of complete nerds who shared my same interests; in particular, the scrawny little guy with the unruly hair and the voice of an angel. Within days I was completely enamored and wanted to find anything else he had been a part of. Alas, I came to a dead end, other than a few outdated TV pilots, and an EP he had out. I bought the EP and have listened to it almost every day for years now. My favorite song on the album is called “Not Alone.” I have struggled with anxiety and depression since middle school and still to this day one of the only things that helps me out of my ruts and calms me down from major anxiety attacks is that song. When I hear Darren sing the lyrics to the chorus, “baby you’re not alone, ‘cause you’re here with me, and nothing’s gonna bring us down cause our love is all we need to make it through…” I can close my eyes, breathe and I turn out just fine.
About a year after the release of AVPM, StarKid had released a new show, titled A Very Potter Sequel. I was overjoyed! I could finally dive back into the world I loved so much. As I expected, the new musical was hilarious and encompassed everything Team StarKid was about. It had so many inside references that only hardcore fans of the Harry Potter series would understand, and so many new songs I knew I would be singing on repeat for weeks on end.
By this time, I had come across a new TV show, Glee. I fell completely in love with the characters and story-lines Glee had to offer. Then on November 9, 2010, what I thought was just another Tuesday, another episode of Glee, my life was changed. In the episode, one of the students, Kurt Hummel, goes to spy on their competition for Show Choir Regionals. As soon as he arrives at Dalton Academy, the school of the rival team, the Warblers, Kurt is sucked into an impromptu performance, led by none other than Darren himself. The first song that Darren’s character Blaine sang, “Teenage Dream,” by Katy Perry, shot up the charts and secured his spot in the hearts of fans everywhere. By the end of the series, the two previous rivals ended up married and taking the world by storm. As someone exploring my sexuality, the love between Blaine and Kurt has inspired me so much and I have always wanted to have the opportunity to tell Darren or Chris Colfer, who played Kurt, just how much they mean to me.
In January of 2012, I almost had that chance. My friend Melissa and I got word that Darren would be starring in a three week engagement of How to Succeed in Business Without Really Trying on Broadway. Obviously, we bought tickets immediately. I mean, who wouldn’t want to witness their biggest crush in his Broadway debut? After days of preparing, it was finally time. We drove the four hours it takes to get from Wildwood, N.J. to Manhattan, N.Y. and arrived at the Al Hirschfeld Theater. The show was incredible, everyone in that cast gave me chills; and of course I was super proud of Darren for coming all this way. After curtain call was over, we raced to the stage door and pushed through the throngs of adoring fangirls to try to get a good spot in case Darren actually came outside! After waiting nearly an hour in the snow, we decided that if he hadn’t come out by then he probably wouldn’t, and that we should leave. I left with a heavy heart and vowed that someday, somehow, I would meet him if it was the last thing I’d do. For then though, having Glee on every week would have to suffice.
This lasted for three more years until March 20, 2015 when Glee aired its series finale. I, like many others, was devastated. Glee had been a huge part of my life through most of middle school and all of high school. It seemed fitting that the show would end mere months before my high school graduation. The finale lived up to every expectation I had for it. All of my favorite characters got their happy endings, everything was good. About a month after the end of Glee, I heard that Darren would be coming back to Broadway, replacing John Cameron Mitchell playing the title character of Hedwig Robinson in a revival of Hedwig and the Angry Inch, a show about a transgender glam-rock star dealing with her botched sex change operation. Again, keeping true to my vow from years ago, I just had to go see this show, and try my luck at meeting Darren at the stage door again. So I told Melissa about it, and like the angel she is, she made it happen.
Arriving at the Belasco Theater, I was anxious as hell waiting in my seat for the show to begin. Ninety glorious minutes later, the show ended and I sat in my seat in total shock and awe of what I just witnessed. Darren lit up that stage like nothing I’ve ever seen before. The transformation into Hedwig was so seamless it was like Darren was gone and Hedwig was all there was. After recovering from my absolute disbelief, Melissa and I raced to the barricade in front of the stage door and tried to get a good spot. One of the security guards saw us struggling and pulled us aside asking “Were you at the show, did you see this show?” After answering that yes, we did in fact see that show, the security woman told us to follow her. I was completely perplexed, I had no idea where she was taking us. We ended up sitting in front of the barricade, in front of everyone else who was there.
My mind was racing, thinking this is it, brace yourself. Don’t say anything stupid. Be cool. About two hours of waiting and socializing with the other fans, the moment came. I looked through the holes in the gate and there he was. After six years of hoping and wishing my dream was about to come true. I was finally going to meet Darren Criss, in the flesh. He took his time to come out to us, speaking to others behind the gate. Then a few excruciating minutes later, the love of my life was standing five feet in front of me, about to come and actually talk to me. Honestly, the conversation we had is a total blur, I just remember pretty much being in tears, speechless as he signed my playbill, took a selfie with me, and joked about me being from “joisey,” as he put it. From what I can piece together the night went as follows:
*Darren comes out of the gate, inciting excited screams from the hundreds of fans there*
Me: *freaking out inside, waiting*
Darren: *to everyone* “Okay, so my voice is kind of shot and I'm exhausted so I can’t really do the whole selfie thing with you guys, just signing playbills, talking, that sort of thing.” But of course, knowing Darren this wasn’t true at all. He proceeded to take the time to know every fan, and squeeze in a selfie or two with each and every one of us. He came to me first, asking what my name was and where I was from. After he signed my playbill, we talked about how I’ve been a fan since the beginning and this meeting was a LONG time coming. To say this was the best day of my life to date would be an understatement.
We all have our reasons for idolizing whomever we do. I consider Darren Criss my idol not only because he is immensely talented, but because he is a genuinely good person. That sort of person is hard to find in Hollywood these days. Darren exemplifies everything a person ought to be to young impressionable people. Kind, patient, and selfless. He’s the kind of person who will go against security rules and take the time to meet and spend a few minutes with every single fan no matter how long it takes him. He has been an advocate for The Trevor Project, a non-profit charity which serves LGBT youth with confidential anonymous counseling focused toward suicide prevention for queer youth. The last thing that makes Darren my idol is that he makes sure his fans know that “baby you’re not alone, cause you’re here with me, and nothings gonna bring us down cause love is all we need.”
