My mother taught me to talk to strangers. I was still warned off of accepting rides or candy, but was admonished when I did not at least smile at passersby. When we lived in New York, I would often be embarrassed by my mother and her aggressive friendliness in a state where people clearly did not want to make eye contact. I now realize, however, how isolating and miserable it is to walk down the street and have people not only not return my smiles and greetings but also deliberately looking away and scowling as if the 5 feet 5 inches college girl singing showtunes is threatening them with her attempt at imitating Pollyanna.

Recently, on a visit to New York City, I was more disheartened than ever after spending a few days on the receiving end of endless glares and shifting eyes. Finally, on my way home, I wished an older man “good afternoon” while waiting for the bus and was elated to receive well wishes in response. I was not alone in this feeling: the man was so thrilled to have someone acknowledge his humanity with a friendly hello that he spent our entire shared bus ride sharing his life story with me in an eager but nonthreatening manner. Because I uttered a few kind words in a gesture that I consider common courtesy, I was graced with the wisdom this man had gained over his life. He told me about living in New York on 9/11 and subsequently the pain and losses he had suffered, the friends he had lost, and the way his perspective on the world had changed. He expounded on his travels, particularly his time living in the mountains of Ohio and the peace and tranquility that accompanied it. By the end of our conversation, he had renewed verve in his quest to go back to his quiet home in the mountains and I had renewed faith in the teachings of my mother.

That afternoon in NYC was not my first encounter with the benefits of friendliness. Many of my days have been brightened by the smile of a stranger or a kind word from a passerby. When life deals you a difficult hand, a stranger who still sees enough positivity in you and thus deems you worthy of a moment of their time can be exactly the boost you need. Paying it forward only takes a moment and it could change a life. Thus, upon considering my future on the remainder of the bus ride to the airport after my new friend departed, I realized that the mountains in Ohio might be lovely, but I would rather live among people whose smiles can brighten even the darkest days.