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I'm Sick Of The 'Talking' Stage In Relationships, It Needs To End

How do you get over someone you weren't even 'with' officially?

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People on phone
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I walk into my friend's room, and we see her roommate laying in bed. She tries to hide her face, but we can feel her pain in the air. I go and sit on her bed, rest my hand on her leg, and she looks at me with puppy dog eyes. "What's wrong?" She leaves me question hanging in the air, a cloud with an obvious storm to come with it.

We wait for a moment, and she shakily starts to talk to us. She talks about this guy she's trying to get over, and how she misses him so much. "But he would always be playing games. He would make me wait forever for a simple text, literally the last text when I decided to cut it off was him replying 'green' after having me wait a whole day and all night for that." There's silence, and we try to comfort her until she blurts out the real problem.

"How can I even be upset over him? We were only talking. How do I get over him when we weren't even together?"

This hit me. I can't say how many times I've felt this same feeling. An empty unfulfillment, with no closure in sight.

I hate talking. I make this clear to most everyone. It is a side effect of our generation growing up with the suffocating ability for constant instant communication.

"Talking" is when you're kind of exclusive with one person, but in my opinion, it's just a scapegoat. It's a way for people not to have to take responsibility for any of the emotional damage they cause on someone, and it's just another way of instant gratification. They can cut someone off easily or start a relationship easily just be saying "We're only talking."

You can be a whole different person, talking to someone behind the emboldening mask of a screen.

How are you supposed to move on? How do you excuse your hurt feelings? When was the last time any of us went on a real date?

With the feminist movement becoming more and more mainstream among adolescents, we have gone away from chivalry. Which is all well and good, power to the woman, but what of love?

I have grown up never knowing a significant other to come to my door, adorning me with flowers or chocolates. We have gone away from the norm of an expectation to make a real connection with people to late night "wyd", "u up?" texts.

I get that we want to feel each other out. But I'm just an all-in, all-out type of person. This act of "talking" is toxic; how can you expect someone to be exclusively "in like" with you, but you won't fully commit yourself to them?

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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