Accept me for who I am or don’t speak to me at all. Those are my continuous thoughts 24/7. I grew up being a very shy and quiet girl for most of my life. I am eighteen years old now. It’s been a long time since I was a kid. I’ve changed. Or at least I thought I did.
When I was in elementary school, people would always make such rude remarks about my personality in general. “You’re so boring.” “Why are you so shy?”. “Why don’t you like anything?” and the most famous one of all, “You’re such a nerd.” The more I would hear it, the more it would make me feel insecure about myself. I had enough of it. Well damn, I’m sorry I don’t meet your expectations of being a very loud and giggly person. I’m not like that. It’s not me. It’s not part of who I am. And it’s definitely not how I express myself to others. We’re all different when it comes to that. Middle school didn’t make it any better and neither did high school. I wanted people to understand that if I didn’t talk to someone or do much outside of school, it was because my personality is simply like that and I was okay with it (I’m still okay with it, by the way.) In middle school, girls wanted me to chase boys just like they did. No. There was no way on earth I was going to go after a guy. I was already super shy. What made you think I was going to take that step? You thought wrong. Everyone wanted me to be different. To change. I don’t understand why anyone would want me to be fake and act like someone I’m not. That’s being a poser. No one should ever think of posing as someone else. It’s a matter of loving yourself and accepting the kind of person you are. I get it. I tend to be boring to most people because I don’t do much. I usually go to school, have a couple of conversations, go home, do my homework, read a couple of books, and that’s it. You have no idea what’s going in my head or what I’m planning. I’m an introvert. (to concentrate or direct upon oneself). But if you don’t like me for that reason and think that I am mundane, then don’t talk to me. It’s simple! Even the teachers at school would complain about it to my mother. It’s ridiculous. It would get to the point where I would notice the annoying tone in their voice every single time words would pour out of their mouths. Either you accept me for who I am or you walk away. Stop complaining about my way of being. After all, it’s me, not you. This is for the everyone out there who comprehends where I’m coming from. For those of you who struggled to make friends in school just like I did. I completely understand what it’s like to be pushed around and for people to be endlessly bugging you for the way you are…naturally.
