Syllabus Week Spring 2017 is officially over at Marist College, and I can already hear the endless lamenting from the students about all of the work they will have until May. Syllabus Week is the Holy Grail of all weeks in a semester: you go to class, probably not for the entire period, just to meet the professor and (maybe) read the syllabus; you get to sleep in because you don't have a lot of homework; you can watch as much Netflix as your heart desires; and of course, Syllabus Week means "getting sylly" and going out almost every night. That is, unless you're an English major.
Now, as I am an English major, I cannot speak for others majors. For the students who are studying other fields, this may also apply. However, at least for English majors, Syllabus Week is a little bit different than what I just described above. So, here is Syllabus Week as told by an English major.
1. Welcome home!
And by home, I don't mean your dorm room or your townhouse. I'm talking about the James A. Cannavino Library, where you'll be spending most of your time this week and this semester.
2. Books. SO MANY BOOKS.
Some people can get away with buying their books during Syllabus Week. But for us English majors, it's likely that you've already been assigned 100 pages of reading for just your first class, so you've been updating the bookstore's website ever since Winter Break began. And your heart (and bank account) definitely breaks when you see the 15+ books you have to buy.
3. The chance that you ordered the wrong edition of one (or more) of your books is quite high.
In fact, you probably already did and you probably spent way more money than you needed to. And now you have to return the book in the right size box, spend a return fee, meaning you'll only get about half of what you spent for the books originally, and then you have to order the correct edition and wait for it to come, and who knows if it will come in time, and...the struggle is REAL.
4. You go into every Syllabus Week thinking it's going to be a blast...and every time, you're disappointed.
Now, this isn't to say that you don't have fun at all, because you do--but you can't go out every night like the rest of your friends. While you'd rather be swimming in a Darby's fishbowl, you're already drowning in about four reading assignments and at least two short essays to write. So during the week, it's adios Union/River/Darby's, and hello books and laptops.
5. Walking into your classes for the first time, you already know almost everybody.
I mean, it's no secret that the population of English majors on this campus is quite small, so it's more than likely that the people you've been in class with for the last few semesters are in your classes again.
6. Same goes for your professors.
And hopefully you're taking classes with your favorites.
7. The coffee obsession continues.
A new semester means even more Thrifty Cash to spend in the Hancock Brew on a delicious latte handcrafted by Suzanne, our favorite barista/person on this campus. While you're slaving away at your analysis of *insert novel/play here*, you know Suzanne will always hook you up with the caffeine you need to keep you going into the night...and maybe even morning.
An accurate representation of us blowing all our Thrifty on coffee.
8. While you might have a lot of work already, you're secretly really excited about it.
While scrolling through the list of books you needed to buy during Winter Break, you nearly had heart palpitations looking at all of your favorite classics on the list. You could hardly wait to analyze the symbolism and character development in class.
Nerdy, but true.
9. Unfortunately, your minor classes have a lot of reading and writing, too.
You thought you could take it easy this semester with two non-English classes. What were the odds you'd be taking a class with ten essays and a quiz with every reading assignment? Apparently high. And let's face it: reading an actual textbook instead of a novel or a play is incredibly boring. When you saw how much reading and writing you would have to do for your other classes, you died a little, knowing this was going to be a looooooooong semester. And probably a tiring one at that.
Me running out of my non-English classes when I see the lengthy syllabus.
10. And when you meet someone new in your non-English class, you're asked the dreaded, "So, you wanna be a teacher, right?"
Sorry, but not all of us English majors want to be teachers. There are tons of alternative career options for English majors, so please keep this in mind when you meet an English major.
11. You've probably already had at least one meeting with an old professor.
A new semester not only means catching up with one of your favorite professors, but more likely than not, you're excited to continue working with your professor on an essay, poem or short story for publishing.
12. When you came back from school, your backpack was filled with new books to read and journals to write in.
And all of these new books and journals now cover half of your desk, while your textbooks cover the other half. Either it's time to find a new study area or it's time to get crackin' on those books...and we all know which one you'd rather do.
13. It's not uncommon for you to hear someone say, "You're still here??"
At noon you sat down at the kitchen table to start one of your many reading assignments while your housemate left to go to three classes. Four hours later, you're still sitting in the same position, just with a different book. This is often a shocking sight to see for most people during Syllabus Week. But, you're used to it.
14. While you hate English major stereotypes, you can't help but look around your classes and acknowledge that some of them are true.
Looking around class, you find yourself in a sea of black sweaters, turtlenecks, and big glasses. There are pencils tucked behind ears, pen tips in between teeth, and a Starbucks coffee cup clenched in most hands. Stereotypical or not, we English majors still have incredible fashion sense and great taste in coffee.
15. When you finally get to go out on Friday, it's pretty exciting.
After watching all of your friends go out during the week, it's finally your time to shine. Put on your favorite outfit and get ready to dance the stress of Syllabus Week away...because there will be even more stress next week. So grab your friends while you can and get to dancing.
While this semester will probably be really hard and tiring, seeing your growth as an English major is so worth it. So get out there, you English major you, and seize not only the day, but the semester.
