I go swing dancing every Thursday night...and some Tuesdays, some Saturdays, and any day I can. I've been dancing for a little over a year now, and it is one of the best things that has ever happened to me. Swing dancing is not just a simple hobby for me; it is as essential to me as eating and breathing. I never thought it would become this important to me, but now I can't imagine my life without it. Swing dancing has brought me peace, confidence, grace, and some of the best people in my life.
God has blessed me immensely through swing dancing. I have somehow gained some of the best friends I have ever made. My friends are rockstars. I adore them -- I really do. They can handle me when I'm over excited about dancing and when I get sick (also from dancing..). They love me enough to give me the tough love of correction but also enough to make sure I feel alright and get home safe (though I am usually the one making sure everyone gets home). They are some of the craziest people I know, and they have shown me some of the most insane and fabulous things in life. They are talented and beautiful. They are intelligent and wise. They are graceful and skilled. And somehow, they are my friends. I learn so much from them.
Though I usually dislike participating in intense physical activities like sports, I can't deny the physical side of swing dancing. And as I explore the physical facet of swing dancing, I find that it is a wonder. I can move my body and use the muscles that God gave me. I can use my entire self. It has become a worship for me. It has become a way to glorify my Creator. I finally understand David and dancing before the Lord. It has become a flawed yet necessary worship for me. To use the body that God made for me, to tense every muscle and move every limb, is a beauty that I did not understand before swing dancing.
Dancing has given me a confidence that I'm not quite sure I had before. Through swing dancing I have become more myself, I believe. I have found the sassy and dramatic side of me, I have found a tender teacher, and I have found the simple joy of letting go. I have always loved control, thrived with it, strived for it. Walking into a situation where I surrender that control to my lead became a new battle for me to face. Dancing is all about trust. For me, to trust my lead is to follow them. To let them make the decisions of where we're going and what we're doing. To give them the lead, obviously. In this I have found the necessity of letting go. And the pain of letting go. Because sometimes you will be led astray, into dangerous places (sometimes they will drop you, or step on your toes). But it is more than worth it because when you dance with someone you trust and can surrender all control to them is when your soul can be set free.
We need to dance with Jesus. We need to trust him and surrender our control to him. We cannot try to lead ourselves in this dance we call life. We don't know all the moves, we might not be watching all the other torrenting couples twirling around us, and we might not know best. Dancing has taught me about Jesus and his heart for me. His need for me to let go and trust that he will catch me. He will give me the tools to do beautiful things. He will lead me beside still waters. He will give me the desires of my heart and thrill me beyond compare. When I trust him with it all.
Surrendering my control is one of the hardest and best things I've ever done. And I still need to do it over and over again, every single day. It is not a battle easily fought nor is it an overnight healing process. Surrendering to Jesus, letting him lead me, is a daily decision of faith, just like I need to choose to trust my lead when I swing dance. And how much more beautiful will a dance with the Prince of Peace be than one on earth?
Jesus, thank you for my body and the ways I can gracefully use it (hopefully). Thank you for your love, please let it shine through me in my worship. Thank you for the family that you have given me in the swing environment. Thank you for teaching me to let go. Thank you for taking everything I throw at you. Please take it all. Take all I have, all I am. Take my control and my fears, take my dreams and plans. For you know best. You are best. I want you. Help me want you.
