Before you write this article off as crazy and illogical, hear me out. Something about these two widely watched televised events attract large crowds and many applicants. Sure it might be harder to get in the Olympics than on "The Bachelor," but to be fair, the Olympics doesn't happen as often as the Bachelor. Why are they so similar? Is the Bachelor trying to replace the Olympics? Disclaimer: this article should in no way be taken as a joke. The author of this article regards satire as a despicable form of journalism and considers this piece to be quite serious.

1. Exotic Locations

Athens, London, Rio. Thailand, Malibu, Buenos Aires.

2. Formal Ceremonies

The opening ceremony of the Olympics is elaborate and long. What is even longer and more elaborate? The final rose ceremony on the Bachelor.

3. Intense Competition

Winning pride for your country versus winning a bride for yourself: who can really tell the difference? All you have to do is switch one letter.

4. Steroid Usage

You can't convince me that Chad Johnson was never on steroids.

5. Attractive Competitors

I think the Olympians and the Bachelorette contestants have all been drinking the same water. And that water must be some powerful stuff!

6. Exciting Events

Watching men play football in an attempt to woo a girl is even more enthralling than watching impressive displays of athleticism and hard work.

7. Crazy Scandals

Tonya Harding's name is almost as recognizable as Chad Johnson.

8. Physical Prowess

Doing pull-ups while adding the weight of protein powder-filled luggage could be an Olympic sport.

9. "Being there for the wrong reasons"

(Cough, cough) Russia. (Cough, cough) Juan Pablo.

10. Awards

Honestly, I'd rather receive a diamond ring as a prize for 1st place than a gold medal.

11. Judging

Athletes from the Olympics are judged for their performance by officials while bachelor contestants are judged for their crazy dumb decisions by the viewers at home!

Is it really just a conspiracy? I think not.