I would have never expected that I was going to miss all of the kids I have spent almost every day with this past summer. I wouldn't say I hate kids but I also wouldn't say that I am a kid person either (don't ask how I got this job). I plan on being the cool aunt rather than the overprotective mother and I tend to avoid places that typically involve screaming children. All that being said, however, I have loved (almost) every moment of this summer.

These kids that I have been fortunate enough to work with are intelligent, hilarious, kind, maddening, brave, talented and wonderful. Yes, even the ones that cause all of the trouble. A lot of the children that come to this camp don’t have the most stable home lives and so it’s proven just how invincible kids can be. They see things without anger or malice or fear because they still believe in magic and the tooth fairy and their imaginations have not yet been diminished by the world’s evils. When we are all outside on the playground for recess, the kids are running around screaming, laughing and playing without any care in the world. Darkness cannot touch them there because they don’t see just a play structure or a swing set or tan bark, they see a giant castle surrounded by a moat full of crocodiles and miniature airplanes patiently waiting to take flight and molten lava flowing under their lava-resistant shoes.

Standing there, I often think: “Was I ever so little? Was my mind ever so pure? When did that change?” I can’t even remember the last time I let my mind relax just so I could play or use my imagination strictly for fun. I’m so frequently caught up in school, politics, social justice issues––the “real world.” A while back I wrote a piece about how unready I felt to be an adult. Well, now I’m realizing just how okay I am with that. It sounds a bit naive and probably very unrealistic, I know, but working at this camp has been therapeutic somehow. I spend most of my days coloring, making crafts, listening to Disney music and hanging out with some pretty remarkable tiny humans. I am reminded each day not to take myself so seriously and to appreciate all of the opportunities I have been blessed with. I have also learned a lot about the type of person I want to be: someone who these kids can look up to, admire and respect. I don't want to be a teacher (major props to those who do want to be and who are teachers), but I do want to be a positive influence for the younger generation.

I am not someone who likes to get too attached to people, I don't open up easily and I definitely do not like to say goodbye. In fact, I would rather avoid the whole issue altogether than experience all of the emotions and drama that go along with saying goodbye. However, I have grown to love these kids. I let them wiggle their way into my heart and I know that come August 12th, I am going to have to say goodbye. I will always be grateful for everything they have taught me this past summer and I hope that they remain kids at heart for as long as they possibly can.