I, along with the rest of the world, have always loved summer. First of all, there's no school, which is always a positive (even a nerd like me needs a break every once in a while). For me, summer also means camp, which is always a highlight of my year and a great way for me to unplug.

But I think the absolute best part of the summer is the sunny, warm weather and how it has has a tremendous impact on my mood and energy in the best way possible.

Summer is truly the best time to relax, unwind, and just have fun.

In the summer especially, I love doing things like spending more time with friends, going to concerts or adventures in the city, or even just a simple night out for ice cream or making s'mores in the backyard.

However, summer 2020 looks very different than any other summer that we have all lived through. All of the plans that you had for this summer look different, or they are completely off the table at this point. Especially in my camp-oriented house, we are thinking about plans for the summer all year long.

And despite the promise of these recent weeks in comparison to what we have lived through in the last couple of months, it still feels uneasy and confusing at some points.

Many people love to make summer bucket lists, as it is the perfect way to motivate yourself to accomplish as many of these exciting activities as possible. A traditional summer bucket list would probably include things like: going to the beach, attending a music festival, watch the sunrise/sunset, making friendship bracelets, going to an amusement park or waterpark, etc.

In a parallel universe, I would be doing many of these things (or at least dreaming about the idea of doing them lol).

By all means, I'm sure that there are going to be many people who attempt to still have this quote-on-quote "normal" summer and may succeed by doing in. I, on the other hand, have decided something different.

Of course, I am still going to try to have a fun and exciting summer, but I am going to place my focus on something else. And that my friends, is the pure concept of living, and more importantly, thinking in the moment.

I feel like this is a cliché, and it probably is, which is why I decided to play a little spin on it and put an emphasis on the "thinking" aspect of it. I would overall describe myself as a future-oriented person. I am always "on the go," constantly planning ahead and thinking about my future.

Whether it's what I'm going to have for my next meal (unfortunately a common thought of mine) or something more long-term like where I'm going to live when I'm older and who I'm going to marry, the future is always on my mind. Every task that I accomplish is followed up by what else or what more I can do.

I know that these are typically positive traits and that it emphasizes my driven and ambitious personality.

But, I have learned that sometimes it's so important for me to take a step back and relax. The problem is, I oftentimes find it really difficult for me to do nothing. I tend to get angry at myself for not being productive enough when in reality I'm probably more productive than the average person.

Sitting on the couch and watching T.V. has somehow turned into a painful task because it makes me feel lazy and gross. I know, I sound psychotic right now because most people's lives revolve around the Netflix series that they're watching. It almost feels like I have to explain myself for not wanting to be like that, but I've grown to realize that I am my own person, and what works for somebody else may not work for me.

I am constantly striving to give my 100 percent 24/7 365, and am slowly starting to realize just how important it is to let myself have a break from it, but in a way that works for me personally.

I also experienced many issues with my forward-thinking especially in terms of this pandemic. Throughout the last few months, many of the things that I had been thinking about or planning for began to change. And this wasn't just things that had been on my mind for months--things during this time were changing nearly by the day, or even by the hour.

This was hard for me to wrap my head around at first because I had a hard time understanding how to move forward.

I couldn't understand what the purpose of doing certain things was if it didn't have a foreseeable outcome.

These two issues have been some of my biggest hurdles during these last couple of months, but I am happy to share that in recent weeks I have gotten a lot better. Since school ended a little over a month ago and in the weeks in between camp starting, I have tried to give myself the opportunity for some "me" time.

Reading has been honestly the perfect thing for me during this time. It kind of tricks my brain into thinking that I'm doing so much more than I actually am when in reality it is so relaxing for me. Putting my phone away has also been extremely important for me, particularly not looking at social media as much.

You don't realize how much precious time you waste scrolling mindlessly on your phone until you put it away.

Little things like this keep me a sane human being and remind me just how important it is to slow down and take in every moment in the present day. I also will admit that I have had some T.V. time lately, and I've secretly been loving it (shhh don't tell anyone I actually said that).

I've also been trying to just focus on what I can do in the present, and let the future come later.

I have been trying to make decisions and work towards goals that are best for me in the current moment, and hope that it will work out in the end. There is no reason to sit and waste time wondering and hoping for a future outcome when it may not even happen, we can cross that bridge if we get there.

This mentality is sometimes a great thing to possess, but especially in times of uncertainty like right now, it is only going to make things worse and drive you crazy. It's crucial that we aren't always thinking about every single thing that we have to do now or one day, instead, we should just think about one little thing we can do right now to make things better for us and focus on that.

If I could take away anything that I've learned during this time, it is this: there is no sense in worrying about the future, we can only control what happens in the present. You hear quotes like that all the time.

You never really understand why they matter until you're in a situation like what we have been living through today.

It has certainly not been easy for me to sit back and let these last couple of months play out like they have, but I have learned and appreciated so much more than I ever would have thought. So even though this summer is starting to shed a glimmer of hope, I am going to continue to slow down and take things moment by moment, day by day.

Rather than scrambling to check off every item on a "bucket list," I'm going to continue to ask myself what I can do every single day to make myself a priority, this summer and beyond.