It’s an all-too-true spectacle in our society: adventurous, ambitious, intelligent, opinionated girl meets boy. Girl silences herself in hopes of impressing, pleasing, or attracting boy.
It’s an unspoken rule to keep your thoughts to yourself when trying to attract someone of interest. Don’t show them too much of yourself, or they may think you’re “too opinionated” or “too aggressive” or (gasp) a “feminist” and run for the hills.
Of course, not all guys react this way, not even the majority. All of the guys in my life that I consider close to me enjoy the company of people who act like themselves, are honest about their ambitions and opinions, and encourage pursuing whatever that may be. But nonetheless, I know a shocking amount of girls who would prefer to be the person that they assume the cute boy from biology wants them to be: cute but not too eccentric, chill but not too boring, funny but not too weird, smart but not smarter than him.
This is 2016, ladies! Long gone are the days that you have to impress a boy so he will "court" you and provide for you and all that jazz. You have the freedom to vote, protest, speak, write, and post whatever you want. Just like you have the freedom and power to pick and choose the guy for you. And let me tell you, the guy for you is not the guy who thinks it’s cute when you pretend to be ditzy. The guy for you is not the guy who pressures you to come over when you have school work to do. The guy for you is not the guy who makes jokes about you getting your MRS degree. The guy for you is not the guy who gets annoyed when you talk about politics. The guy for you is not the guy who laughs at you when you ask questions.
You shouldn’t feel like you have to go to his fraternity function even though you have a test the next morning for him to still like you. You shouldn’t feel like he shuts down your ideas or asks you to “tone it down” around his “very opinionated” roommates.
In friendships and relationships, the people you surround yourself with will ultimately be a determinant in your personal success. Successful, driven people surround themselves with successful, driven people. You should never feel embarrassed or scared to express your opinions or to reach for an “over-the-top” dream. There is nothing wrong with being motivated, caring about your studies, preferring to watch the presidential debate over Netflix and chill, or staying in from a party to take a night for yourself.
Surround yourself with friends and a significant other that encourages you, finds your knowledge and ambition attractive, and isn’t afraid of your girl power, because you are MORE than enough. You have the ability to be whoever and do whatever you so please, so why are you waiting around for some dude to tell you you’re “cute?" You are beyond intricate, interesting, and intelligent. Wake up every morning and remember that.
I couldn't decide which GIF was more fitting, so please enjoy both:
