Relationships of all kinds are a topic I love to discuss. Whether I'm writing about them on here or talking to family and friends, I find it fascinating to discuss and understand the different viewpoints people have on the various relationships in their life—friends, family, and romantic—and how these viewpoints affect their approaches to such relationships. For many, having any one of these relationships end or not be considered ideal is considered a personal failure, but I want to display that sometimes such failures or pitfalls may be the kind of push a person may need to succeed.

I've written about friendships before, as it's a topic regarding relationships that I think may be one of the most interesting. Based on my own views and the views of others in what friendship is and what it means, I argue that our approaches to both friendships and relationships are probably the most individualistic and divided of all three of the main types of relationships within our lives.

For some, friendship is about finding people to help you advance. For others, friendship may be finding another family, or a family dynamic they did not get to experience growing up. We all find friends in different ways, and we all have different definitions of what makes a friend or a best friend.

Along with this, we also have different ideas of what "breaks" a friendship, what may cause it to end or be considered a failure. However, to find success in these breaks, we need to form an understanding of our own faults in its ending. Particularly with friendships, it can be hard to find and admit your guilt in why the friendship ended, as passing the blame on to the other person is always the easiest option. Knowing this, however, presents the perfect opportunity to face your inner demons and to be able to confront them through apologizing for your part and moving on. Respectfully moving on from these friendships, knowing where the line has been drawn is a building block to creating better friendships, while also learning more about the side of yourself you may want to ignore.

Now let's turn to family, a relationship that is a pretty mixed bag for everyone. I am lucky enough to say I have a very close, very supportive family, who I can always turn to if I need to. However, I am well aware that not every person is as lucky to have a strong or close relationship with their family. Many people have found themselves cast out by their family for many reasons, such as their sexual or gender identity or the career path they have chosen. Family relationships are not always easy to navigate, but I think the important thing to keep in mind is that you cannot choose your family.

There is an unconditional love within a family that is supposed to be unbreakable, but those who choose to make it conditional do not know what the true meaning of family is. If your relationship with a family member seems to come to an end for something as conditional as who you love or what you are passionate about, stand up for yourself, and remember that you have someone out there who loves you and does accept you and encourage you to be your truest self. In doing so, you can assert the kinds of values that will carry you through life. Accepting the situation for what it is will strengthen the bonds between you and your family members who understand what family means, and set an example of what unconditional love truly is.

Finally, the most confrontational of failed relationships in my opinion: romantic relationships. I talk about romance a lot—especially with my friends—and I've noticed as we've grown older, what we expect from relationships have changed. Romantic relationships can have a multitude of endings ranging from mutual and possibly open-ended to one-sided and the end of the road, there's a lot to unpack in the world of failed romance. I think the greatest success you may gain from the end of a failed romantic relationship is strength—strength to perhaps end a bad relationship or to confront an issue you were having with the other person, or just the strength to feel okay when everything is over.

It's not easy to be strong, but even just putting on a brave face after someone significant leaves your life is something to be proud of. You can also gain a sense of what you truly want or expect within a relationship, which makes looking for a new significant other, or perhaps remaining single, a clearer, somewhat easier choice. Establishing your own values and expectations with yourself first helps you navigate the world of romance with both clearer vision and a clearer heart.

I am currently pretty happy with my life—I have good friends, a loving family, and a stable, happy relationship. As much as I don't want to, however, for the most part, I owe what I have and my appreciation to those who have made my life difficult, frustrating, or who just plain left it. Saying goodbye to some people is easy, saying it to others isn't, but no matter what, remind yourself what is important. What's important isn't the bad memories—and sometimes not even the good—but what you learned about yourself from the experience, and how you can use it to move on.