I don’t know about you, but my life is super stressful. “I don’t know what to wear, I’m stressed.” “I got stranded at the movie theater last night -- I was so stressed out.” “Is Rory going to choose Dean or Jess? This is so stressful.” (Okay, that last one was for real, though. Oh, the struggle!) Honestly, the amount of times I tell myself I’m stressed out actually ends up stressing me out more because it feels like the more I say it to myself, the more I believe it.
In all seriousness, I would argue that most college kids have a lot of anxiety-inducing things going on in their lives, whether it's school, finding a job, paying loans or deciding for which frat theme party you are going to dress up. At this time in a student's life, there are a lot of changes, uncertainty and moving parts that seem to all be interconnected and therefore dependent on each other. It is perfectly alright to be worried about it all every now and again; the problem comes when you let it get the best of you.
Enter the idea of a stress or anxiety spiral. It’s that moment when you one stress leads to another, and then to another, and then it all blows up in your face a la Seamus Finnigan in potions class. Good stuff.
According to UK mental health organization Mind Your Head, “The problem with stress is that the symptoms can often feed on one another. You can be stressed and so become frustrated which makes you more stressed. The symptoms you experience emotionally can also produce physical changes, which again can leave you feeling more stressed than you were to begin with."
I think that this snowball effect hits high achievers especially hard, because they see the road to success as a succession of carefully laid out stepping stones, where one misstep means you’ve veered off the path. But,as we probably all know, the constant stress of this mindset comes at a price.
"The irony is that by talking about how much stress you feel only tends to make you feel more stressed," wrote Forbes contributing writer Margie Warrell. "Then, as the dial on your internal stress barometer winds up, your ability to cope with other potentially stressful situations goes down sending you into a downward stress spiral. All the while, the toll on your body, your productivity and your sanity mounts."
So you feel stressed, and then you feel stressed that you are stressed, which makes you less productive, focused and happy, which in turn makes you... wait for it… more stressed! What a lovely cycle. But as this cycle builds and gains momentum, it is important to remember how it started in the first place.
The UT Counseling and Mental Health Center suggests, “Many times when we feel overwhelmed with anxiety, we are not just worried about one thing but several things. If we stop to "pull them apart" we often discover that the big worry is made up of several smaller worries that build on each other…If we can challenge the smaller worries when they start, they won't have a chance to grow and collect new ones.”
When you start to feel anxious, it is usually due to one smaller issue or event that sets the tone. By breaking up your ever-expanding list of worries, it can be easier to tackle your stress spiral and pick off your woes one by one. Focus on smaller, more immediate problems instead of getting carried away with the “what if’s” of life down the road. They will come along soon enough -- there’s no point in stressing now.