I Really Need You To Stop Selling Me Your Fitness Products Online

I Really Need You To Stop Selling Me Your Fitness Products Online

I'm looking at you Beach Body, Shakeology, Herbalife, Weigh Watchers, etc...

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It's the beginning of the new year and all these girls are coming out of the wood-work. Ladies from high school, summer camp, freshman year of college and yes, even strangers are messaging me about fitness goals and a "new way" of healthy living. It's so funny, because I genuinely don't care about wanting to become more fit or healthier than I already am. But it's also sad, because there are actually people paying money to use these random workout formulas or pre-packaged snacks and meal-replacement shakes (that may I add make you poop uncontrollably).

I mean I've been there, I've used these products once or twice. I'm not discrediting the changes that can be made using these programs, I'm just saying they aren't for me and they shouldn't be for you either. I don't watch every meal I eat. I don't exercise every day. And I definitely do not have an 'accountability group'. I'm not interested in looking great in my beach body (and hello, EVERYBODY is a great beach body). I'm not interested in joining an 'awesome group of ladies' who all have a common goal of fitness.

Right now, I'm a broke just-out-of-college student. I'm interning right now and putting most everything I make into savings. I don't have 199$ for the year, 35$ a month, or 100$ for the next half year to buy shakes, workouts, coaching, meal prep kits, DVDs etc. Even if I did, I wouldn't want to spend my hard earned money on something like that.

I also love to eat. Chick-Fil-A, Freddy's, Huey Magoo's, Panera, Wendy's...you name it. I don't eat out more than twice a week, but when I do, it's WORTH IT. I watch what I put in my body and that should be enough. The changes using these paid programs are noticeable, but are they lasting? Personally, what's always worked the best for me is when there's been a balance between what's good and what's not, then I don't need a program, coach, or accountability group to tell me what healthy living is.

I've found out that health isn't a number, weight is. I notice that when I worry more about the numbers on the scale, I can often abandon the important notion of what a healthy and happy body is. Which can sometimes be a few pounds over what we think we should be! As long as there's some sort of cardio and weights going on, I tend to stay right where I need to be naturally.

There's something to be said about companies who launch products geared at men and women to help lose weight and keep it off. It promotes a dependency on that particular product, which is where the money is at. No matter how great of a mission statement any one weight loss or health business can have, at the end of the day it's still just a business. There has to be income coming from somewhere. It just so happens that the income coming in to these corporations are from people who depend on meal kits, shakes, workouts, and accountability groups to get them to their next 'goal' of looking slimmer, being thinner, and losing more weight.

I think Jameela Jamil said it best when she remarked, "WANT MORE THAN THIS".

There is absolutely nothing wrong with wanting to live a healthy lifestyle. By eating right using the foods you buy, exercising to your own drum, and offering yourself a positive body narrative---you can see the change in yourself, without paying money to companies that feed off your dependency.

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To The Person Who Feels Suicidal But Doesn't Want To Die

Suicidal thoughts are not black and white.
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Everyone assumes that if you have suicidal thoughts that means you want to die.

Suicidal thoughts are thought of in such black and white terms. Either you have suicidal thoughts and you want to die, or you don't have suicidal thoughts and you want to live. What most people don't understand is there are some stuck in the gray area of those two statements, I for one am one of them.

I've had suicidal thoughts since I was a kid.

My first recollection of it was when I came home after school one day and got in trouble; and while I was just sitting in the dining room I kept thinking, “I wonder what it would be like to take a knife from the kitchen and just shove it into my stomach." I didn't want to die, or even hurt myself for that matter. But those thoughts haven't stopped since.

I've thought about going into the bathroom and taking every single pill I could find and just drifting to sleep and never waking back up, I've thought about hurting myself to take the pain away, just a few days ago on my way to work I thought about driving my car straight into a tree. But I didn't. Why? Because even though that urge was so strong, I didn't want to die. I still don't, I don't want my life to end.

I don't think I've ever told anyone about these feelings. I don't want others to worry because the first thing anyone thinks when you tell them you have thoughts about hurting or killing yourself is that you're absolutely going to do it and they begin to panic. Yes, I have suicidal thoughts, but I don't want to die.

It's a confusing feeling, it's a scary feeling.

When the depression takes over you feel like you aren't in control. It's like you're drowning.

Every bad memory, every single thing that hurt you, every bad thing you've ever done comes back and grabs you by the ankle and drags you back under the water just as you're about the reach the surface. It's suffocating and not being able to do anything about it.

The hardest part is you never know when these thoughts are going to come. Some days you're just so happy and can't believe how good your life is, and the very next day you could be alone in a dark room unable to see because of the tears welling up in your eyes and thinking you'd be better off dead. You feel alone, you feel like a burden to everyone around you, you feel like the world would be better off without you. I wish it was something I could just turn off but I can't, no matter how hard I try.

These feelings come in waves.

It feels like you're swimming and the sun is shining and you're having a great time, until a wave comes and sucks you under into the darkness of the water. No matter how hard you try to reach the surface again a new wave comes and hits you back under again, and again, and again.

And then it just stops.

But you never know when the next wave is going to come. You never know when you're going to be sucked back under.

I always wondered if I was the only one like this.

It didn't make any sense to me, how did I think about suicide so often but not want to die? But I was thinking about it in black and white, I thought I wasn't allowed to have those feelings since I wasn't going to act on them. But then I read articles much like this one and I realized I'm not the only one. Suicidal thoughts aren't black and white, and my feelings are valid.

To everyone who feels this way, you aren't alone.

I thought I was for the longest time, I thought I was the only one who felt this way and I didn't understand how I could feel this way. But please, I implore you to talk to someone, anyone, about the way you're feeling; whether it be a family member, significant other, a friend, a therapist.

My biggest mistake all these years was never telling anyone how I feel in fear that they would either brush me off because “who could be suicidal but not want to die," or panic and try to commit me to a hospital or something. Writing this article has been the greatest feeling of relief I've felt in a long time, talking about it helps. I know it's scary to tell people how you're feeling, but you're not alone and you don't have to go through this alone.

Suicidal thoughts aren't black and white, your feelings are valid, and there are people here for you, you are not alone.

If you're thinking about hurting yourself please call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255 or visit suicidepreventionhotline.org to live chat with someone. Help it out there and you are not alone.


Cover Image Credit: BengaliClicker

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To The Girl Working On Her Summer Body

These goals won't just come to you, you have to get out there and find the resources to get that goal!

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Even though summer is months away from now, all I think about is my summer body. All I want is to be in perfect shape for this upcoming summer with all the trips that are planned. I've realized that putting off working out isn't going to help anything. Really you need months to get that dream summer body we all dream about, so hitting the gym weeks before isn't really going to solve anything.

We all spend the money to get your hair done, nails done, spend money at the mall easily, and weekends out; not even a question. So why put a price point on your body? You wear that every single day. You want to look your best and feel your best, then invest in putting in the time to workout is worth it itself.

Don't put off getting into shape and your dream body till next year. If 2019 really is going to be your year then get it, girl! You are in control of every decision you make, but putting off one goal can lead to ruining the next goals to come!

These goals won't just come to you, you have to get out there and find the resources to get that goal!

There is no excuse for this year. If this is something you want, get it done! Health is so important these days! It gets you to those goals of your dream body and not only will you feel better physically you will feel better mentally also!

It's not about starving yourself to get this summer body, really there is no summer body; it's just a healthy body. Don't starve yourself to get the goal it's not healthy and can lead down paths no one should go through. Learn how to get out of the habit of eating junk and fast food all the time. Take the time to read about nutrition, meal prep, just eat healthier. Also don't completely overdo it, yes you will be working to be healthier, stronger, and fitter, but listen to your body. If something hurts don't overdo it and possibly damage yourself. As much as you want it, it's not worth injuring yourself over it.

Everybody is beautiful in their own way. But being healthy should be everyone's goal. It can really change your lifestyle.

I was always skinny but never entirely happy with my body. Plus I was always sick, whatever anyone had I would get. I was always dehydrated from not drinking enough water. And my mental health was not in a good state. Since I started working out I learned to love my body and I do 100% now. I drink my body weight in oz of water and it has me feeling so much better. I still have days where I wake up and don't feel good, but I get up and get what I need to get done and throughout the day I feel so much better. My mental health is in such a good state right now. Being more body positive and looking at life with such a more positive attitude really helps.

There are ways to get healthier and look out for your body. You just need to find the right ones for you! Crush those goals and kill it this summer!!

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