Stop Mourning David Bowie

Stop Mourning David Bowie

The explosion of support for David Bowie and why that's so harmful
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A lot of people in the spotlight died this year. So many people mourned for these people as though they had known them. Plenty of these people touched our lives in ways that they couldn' have imagined. I can understand that. I can completely respect the feeling of loss surrounding these deaths, with the singular exception of David Bowie.

We make it a priority not to talk about it, but David Bowie was a rapist. A child rapist at that. In addition to the 1987 accusation made by a woman named Wanda Nichols, a girl by the name of Lori Maddox revealed that she had had what she deemed 'consensual sex' with David bowie. The problem there being that at the time the 'consensual sex' occurred, Bowie was nearly thirty while Maddox was only thirteen years old.

Among the Bowie fans that are aware of his actions, there is a trend of behavior to try and somehow undo it or make it okay. The three most common trends that I have noticed in such articles are as follows.

His actions were a product of the times.

Torture was also a product of the times. Lynchings were products of the times. 'Everyone else is doing it' is not a justification for anything, let alone a justification for committing child rape. Even if at the time what he did had been legal (it wasn't), that still would not have made it right. It used to be legal to beat your wife and illegal for people of color to vote. That doesn't mean that domestic violence was okay or that a latino guy voting is wrong.

The girls are lying. Or maybe just confused.

You'd think that after Bill Cosby, we'd know better than to dismiss women who come forward out of hand. Still, for those of you who are unaware, no reputable source has ever predicted that the percentage of rape accusations that are false are any higher than 4% at most. We also know that when someone is falsely accused or rape, they will almost invariably be a black or latino man. Given that money, fame and power also contribute to being less likely of being falsely accused of sexual assault, the odds of Bowie not having raped these girls are astronomically small.

Separate the artist from the art.

You cannot separate the artist from the art any more than you can separate the abuse from the abuser. To consume the things that the abuser has produced is to support him or her, both ethically or financially.


What with Bowie being dead, it might seem like there aren't consequences in celebrating him or in consuming his work. I would like to reassure you fro the bottom of my heart that there absolutely are.

Not only do these actions inform abusers that what they have done is not, in fact, forfeited their humanity, but is more like something akin to misbehaving; It also takes an emotional toll on victims. It sends the message that what happened to them wasn't really that bad of a thing and that both it and they do not matter as much as this really catchy song does.

As a rape victim, I'm not sure that I have the vocabulary to describe what I feel when I see someone lamenting the loss of Bowie, or giving Woody Allen a standing ovation. I don't think that there are words to express the sort of grief and rage that this brings. the only way I know how to describe it is to put it in the context of something else.

I remember an instance where I was being molested in a stairwell. My chest was entirely exposed and I was looking at the ground, trying to leave my body behind me. As this was happening, half the frisbee team came into the stairwell on their way to practice, with me in full view. I yanked down my shirt and stood there as they filed past me, feeling my throat burning. As they walked away, and my then-boyfriend returned to his assault on my body, I remember hearing an indistinct voice saying something about 'her' and the others bursting into laughter. The feeling I get is not unlike the feeling that I had in that moment. The shame, rage, powerlessness and complete abject humiliation, that I felt then is very similar to the feeling tat I get reading facebook posts about people mourning "the passing of such a great man."

Someone is an abuser before they are an artist. Before they are a visionary or an activist or a political force. You didn't actually know this man. But I promise you, you know plenty of rape victims, even if you don't know that you do. Part of growing up is realizing that your heroes aren't who you thought they were. They might even be the bad guys. Bowie falls into this category. The world is a better place without him in it. It's painful. It sucks. I get it. Still, there is beauty in that realization. It comes hand in hand with the realization that if these people weren't the heroes we needed, then maybe we have the responsibility and the chance to be.

Cover Image Credit: Den Of Geek

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If Taylor Swift Songs Were Types Of Alcohol

Because what's better than a drink and some T-Swift?
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With Taylor Swift's quick return to the music scene... and in a big way, might I add, I decided to associate some of the best Taylor Swift songs with alcohol.

I mean, who wouldn't want to drink to Taylor Swift's catchy melodies and perfect choruses to get over an ex or tell someone exactly how you feel about them?

Taylor Swift has been around for a decade at this point, and let's face it, pretty much all of her songs could go along with at least one type of alcohol.

1. "Welcome To New York" - Moscow Mule

It only makes sense. Visit the Big Apple and you have to indulge in the state's signature cocktail. Moscow mules are a New York classic, and if it's your first night in the city and you haven't bought yourself one, are you even in New York?

2. "Blank Space" - Everclear

Think about it... A night of drinking Everclear will leave you with a giant blank space the next day. You might also look like Taylor did in the music video.

3. "Tim McGraw" - Beer

Tim McGraw is a throwback to Taylor's high school love. What better way to reminisce than with a couple friends and a keg of your favorite cheap beer?

4. "Style" - Cristal Champagne

What's more stylish than with a glass of the most expensive bubbly you can find? Just like Taylor Swift, Cristal will never go out of style.

5. "Shake It Off" - Martini

Get it? Cause you shake a martini? I might be the only one who thinks that's funny but you might end up dancing a little bit with a martini in hand when "Shake It Off" come on the radio.

6. "Red" - Merlot


Red has to go along with a red wine. What else could go along with yet *another* T-Swift breakup song?

7. "22" - Margaritas

Let's face it, when you're 22, you really only drink margaritas. They're fun- and all the hipsters are probably drinking them too.

8. "Teardrops On My Guitar" - Southern Comfort

When your heart is broken, who are you going to turn to besides the only alcohol that gives you comfort...Southern Comfort that is.

9. "I Knew You Were Trouble" - Fireball

I can't say I've ever met anyone who spent a night with Fireball and didn't regret it the next morning.

10. "Look What You Mad Me Do" - Tequila

T-Swift's latest single is an angry one. What better to make you angry than tequila? Taylor basically just called out everyone who had ever talked about her behind her back and she did it in true Taylor fashion-by writing a song. She was probably drunk on tequila when she wrote it too.

11. ...Ready For It? - Bottomless Mimosas

Because it's just that good.

Cover Image Credit: YouTube

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Board Games Are More Important Than You Think They Are

They've become a defining part of my family.

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Remember when you were a kid and you'd have a family game night? Or your friends would come over and you'd open the game cabinet and play at least three different games together?

Maybe it's just me, but those are some of my best memories from my childhood. My family loves games, board games, and electronic games.

Of course, as I got older, gaming consoles like PlayStation and Wii became more and more popular. That meant that the game cabinet was opened less and less, collecting dust.

Thankfully, I live in New Jersey near the shore and Hurricane Sandy left my family with no power for five days. Sure, it was scary not having power and walking around my neighborhood seeing fallen trees or roof shingles, but we were inland enough to not have had any flood water damage.

No power also meant no PlayStation or Wii games. The gaming cabinet was opened again, this time with vigor. Now, four years later, and I still think about sitting in the dark with a flashlight playing Scrabble with my family.

That was also the week I learned how to play Yahtzee and dominated my dad in every game. My sister constantly was looking for someone to play her to Battleship. We exhausted Rummikub.

The game was already a family favorite, and that's including extended family. Family barbeques had been ending with late night games of Rummikub for at least a year by the time Sandy hit.

We were ready to strategize and crunch numbers, but after day three, we never wanted to a number ever again.

This semester, there's been a surge of board game love again in my family. My sister bought Jenga, which we are currently trying to exhaust ourselves with. My favorite board game also had a comeback: Life.

I loved this game so much that I had the SpongeBob version as a kid. I would play it with my best friend, just the two of us, playing game after game of Bikini Bottom themed Life. Now, I have a car full of "kids" that I've started to make pets in my head. I can handle having five pretend dogs, but not five pretend kids.

I don't know what it is about board games, but my family has always had an affinity for them. We've gone through our cycles of playing video games and card games, but we always come back to the classics. Maybe it's more a defining part of my family than I originally thought.

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