It has come to my attention as a college-age female corresponding with college-age males that my “busy” lifestyle almost always serves as a damper on the potential relationship. These guys seem genuinely perplexed over the fact that I am not available to “chill” at any time of the day or night. They are often saddened when I tell them that I just left two consecutive meetings or that my choir rehearsal ran late, but that we learned two new songs and sound incredible. I am fed up with it. I will not feel remorseful for living the absolutely awesome life I have created for myself at this institution. So no, I will not forgo my extra study time or the interesting panel discussion happening next Thursday, simply because a guy’s ego says I should. I have come to a quick conclusion that if my “busy life” scares you now, there is no point in pursuing me any further because I am not going to change.

I am unapologetically obsessed with my future. Every morning, I open my eyes in the dormitory of a world class university in which I pay to attend. As long as I walk the campus of Seton Hall University, my full-time occupation is to be the most exemplary student leader I can be. Similarly, I expect myself to always be working towards bettering myself in every way possible. I believe that you get out of something what you put into it, so I am dedicated to putting my all into my experience here. I am basically addicted to the organizations, habits, and positions needed in order to be my definition of successful and to elevate the groups that I care so deeply about. My time seems to evaporate into thin air once I plan out my days. Between my school work, various meetings, sleep schedule, study sessions, social life, physical fitness plan, and Netflix watch list, I have a forged a dynamic routine that works for me. I take time every weekend to let loose and dance the night away with my friends, trust me – I am not just getting lost in being a stressed busy bee.

I am just disappointed when I express this all to someone and they take it as me being uninterested in them and just too busy. In my ideal relationship, I will be with someone who is working as hard as I am to grow on their own journey. I want to be in a relationship in which we are each other’s biggest cheerleaders, not one in which I feel bad for accomplishing my dreams. I am not attracted to someone who already feels threatened by my lifestyle or my goals because I can guarantee this is just the beginning.

So the next time I get the text from a guy saying I’m “too busy for them :( ”… I am going to respond with “And you aren’t busy enough for me!”