I know that you are probably wondering what I am talking about. If you are reading my article and you are not aware of what I mean by "emotional porn,” then before you continue reading, you should go and read T.J. Mousetis' article on this topic, Stop Looking at Emotional Porn. Mousetis has a lot of really great things to say on this topic that I am going to feed off of, so you probably will want to understand where I am coming from.

First off, I am not talking about the sexual type of porn that of which you are probably thinking. I have never had a struggle with that, but I know that many men and women around the world do struggle with addictions to pornography. Mousetis is one of these people, recovering from his addiction, as he mentioned in his blog post. I respect those who can openly admit to any addiction that they may have or have had in their life. I respect them even more if they do something about the addiction and work to help others like them, as Mousetis and so many others are doing.

The type of porn that I am talking about is that of Emotional Porn. In T.J. Mousetis' article he says that "porn is not real... It is a fantasy world that is not even close to reality at all.” I really liked this quote and thought that it related directly to not just sexual porn, but emotional as well. Emotional porn is looking at someone else on social media sites or in reality and seeing just the outside of who they are and comparing yourself to them. What you are doing is looking at the good parts of them, the parts that they want to share with all of their followers and friends and comparing that to the crappy parts of your life. Mousetis quoted a pastor who said this: "The reason we struggle with insecurity is because we compare our behind-the-scenes with everyone else's highlights". I can definitely agree with Pastor Steven Furtick on this because myself, as well as many others will compare what others post on their Instagram’s with how we are doing in real life.

I have some things to add to T.J. Mousetis' list of "What is Emotional Porn?"...

It is looking at all of the other couples on social media and thinking that their relationships are better, Godlier, healthier and so on than my relationship with Tim.

It is looking at all of the girls in the pictures on Pinterest and thinking that they can pull those outfits off way better than I ever could.

It is when I would tweet on Twitter in high school and say rude things about other people, but not tag them in it and just hope that they would read it and know it is about them.

It is feeling jealous when guys are posting sappy posts about their girlfriends, when deep down I know that Tim does not need to do that to express his love for me.

It is something that I indeed deal with on a daily basis, like many other people around the world. I just never had a name for what I was struggling with until I recently read this article from T.J. Mousetis. As I read, I could hear my head screaming, "HEY, you do that too!".

I spend a lot of time on social media every day and at least once a day, I get that "swirly" feeling that Mousetis talks about in his post. He defined "swirly" in the comments as feeling "anxious, stressed, frustrated, or a combination of all three" after looking at someone's post that made you feel like their life was better and more exciting than yours. I imagine that you also feel this way sometimes too.

So what can we do about our addiction to emotional porn? Do we just delete all of our social media accounts? Unfollow or unfriend all of the people that make us feel swirly? Well, the answer to those questions is up to you. You need to do whatever you feel will help with your addiction and will decrease your comparisons of yourself to other people. For me, it was unfollowing all of the famous people that I follow on Instagram, reminding myself daily that Tim loves me and cares for me just as much as those other cares care for their girlfriends, and remembering that each and every person has rough times in their lives, they just are not going to show those parts on social media. Just know that you are not alone in this addiction and you are loved by the Lord. He created you and the person that you are comparing yourself to, both in His image.